10 Silly ‘Sexpectations’ EVERY Girl Has From Her *First Time*
First times are always tricky – clubbed with apprehensions and a myriad of fears, every girl has a set of expectations from her first time sex. Only after you’ve been there, done that do you realize that they were kind of unreasonable in an utterly humourous way... You can thank us later for this gyaan!
1. Very filmy
For millennials, making love is very Bollywood inspired. You expect music to play in the background, and to be wearing a sexy sari with the pallu blowing with the wind, getting wet in the rain with your guy... Sorry. None of this happens! (Thankfully!)
2. Let there be light
Scented candles bring the most sensual thoughts to mind and even if you plan to light a few – the fan will blow them away. It's a wasted effort, ladies!
3. Hairy story
So you think your silky tresses will stay in place while he runs his fingers through them? Open hair during love making is closer to the girl from the movie ‘The Ring’. Yes, really!
4. The sexy lingerie bit
And did you imagine yourself to be wearing that sheer robe? Or a lacy thong beneath a fabulous dress that he unzips sexily? Yeah, that almost never happens! If you're not wearing your period panties - you're set. Trust us!
5. Water baby
That perfectly timed shower during which the water flows, he touches you in an intimate way sounds lovely until soap gets into your eyes and he whacks your knee with his elbow.
6. Pillow fight
That whole feathers in the air thing in movies is supported by a hidden fan under the bed. Besides, in your case, the pillow could have ugly cotton or foam stuffing. So no point in romanticizing this!
7. Food for thought
That whole sexy ‘let me feed off your body’ bit in reality can be messy – very, very messy!!!
8. Blooming tale
A bed of flowers sounds like such a cliché but kinda romantic too. But, beware - the petals start poking you in odd places and making you feel super itchy!
9. Inspired sutra
If Kamasutra poses seem easy to you - know that they seem easy to everyone on paper. If you aren't an olympic level gymnast then it's probably not gonna happen the first time, girl. Nope.
10. The morning after
We know you think you would look like a greek-goddess, happy and blushing with him next to you… That's the expectation! In reality, you both are more likely to be fighting for bathroom space.
GIFs: Giphy, Tumblr
Published on Mar 2, 2017