Two people meet, sparks fly between them, they fall in love and...eventually, they get horny. Well, it’s only natural. After a lot of practice and sharing your bed with someone, sexual intercourse becomes easy, something that you look forward to doing every day. But like with all couples, things aren’t always smooth sailing. Initially, it’s always a little awkward for any couple but even more so with couples who are plagued with a massive height difference. Well, if your partner is way taller than you are, then this is a list you will totally relate to!
1. Missionary seems scary
Although the easiest position to settle into and the most satisfying one, the missionary seemed like a rather destructive position to try as he was constantly worried that he would crush you with the weight of his body. Goodbye, missionary. It was nice knowing you, see you soon.
2. The standing doggy style never works
Well, duh, because, you are half his size and things just don’t “fit”.
3. Standing sex? No?
You probably watched those porn videos where the actors do it while standing up and you thought you’d give it a shot too. As soon as you started you realized how impractical it was... He had to bend, you had to stand on your tip-toes and things weren’t the greatest, to put it lightly. Sigh, it is a hard life.
4. Shower sex? Why, wonderful. No, thanks.
He is taller than your shower head. The one time you did try it - he hit his head on the nozzle and almost got a concussion. And things just don't line up if you know what we mean.
5. Summer of 69
Hell of 69, really. Really unfortunate that the height difference would pose such complications to simple, oral pleasures.
6. Uhm, awkward
Sometimes when he picks you up, he does it so effortlessly... As though he were picking a child up. This makes you feel bad because you actually do feel like a little kid next to him and it kinda kills the mood for you sometimes.
7. Sitting on top of his lap just so happens to be your thing
Well, after you tried everything else, you've realized that bouncing on top of him is probably the best sex you guys are ever going to have… And you aren't complaining about that, hell no.
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Published on Jul 02, 2016