Is Casual Sex Really A Good Idea?
Some of us have done it, most of us are curious about it. And if you’ve ever been single for a longish stretch of time, then you most certainly have wondered about it. After all, just because you’re not in a relationship doesn’t mean that you don’t have physical desires to deal with. So here’s our pros and cons list. Read on, and decide for yourself whether casual sex really is a good idea - and a good idea for you.
1. It’s fun and tremendously liberating
To find pleasure with another person, with no emotional baggage whatsoever, is a great thing. And it feels good to be wanted by someone who is happy to go to bed with us. It’s also a very freeing experience, especially for those of us who have grown up equating sex with sleeping with someone we’re in love with.
2. But it pays to be careful
Your topmost priority if you’re a sexually active woman? Your own safety and well-being. So, although in a committed, monogamous relationship, it might not be the end of the world to forget a condom once in a while, in a scenario where you’re getting into bed with someone you don’t know all that well, you can’t afford to be careless even for a second.
3. It’s a great way to experiment
We do sometimes want to explore our sexuality (further), and push our own boundaries… And sometimes we hesitate to do these things with a partner we’re in a relationship with because we’re too embarrassed to articulate our fantasies or just plain scared of shocking them senseless. But when it’s a sexual relationship that is based on just mutual attraction and satisfaction, it’s easier to be uninhibited, to experiment.
4. But you need to be cautious too
Bear in mind that there are plenty of creeps out there, and pay heed to the cautionary tales that your friends have to tell about their experiences. So even if you are hooking up with someone you’ve just met, ask yourself clearly whether you’re ready for it, and whether you trust him at least a little bit - if there’s the faintest warning sign that your potential bedmate might be the “pushy” kind, or someone who won’t take no for an answer, walk away right then and there.
5. You don’t need to commit to anything
This is worth stating. Good sex, or bad sex, you are not committed to giving him feedback or a repeat performance. It’s no-strings-attached action between the sheets, and you get to walk away at the end of it.
6. But be ready for a certain amount of rejection
Keep in mind, though, that the other person isn’t making any promises either. The thing is, if you’re a girl reading this, chances are you’ll very rarely - or even never - face rejection at the get-go. But there are guys who will say no to sleeping with a girl a second time, even if the offer is strictly no-strings. And there are guys who will be super nice to you, but the moment the sex is done, they’re totally done, and you will never see or hear from them again. And that morning-after phone call...it often doesn't come. You have to make your peace with that.
7. It keeps you in practice
Skills, bro! After all, the more you do it, the better you get at it. So if you’re readily - and steadily - getting sex, chances are your bedroom game is improving constantly. Which is nothing to sneer at!
8. But it can also make you feel detached
Not our place to judge in any way, but here’s some fair warning. Only having casual sex - with no other kind of intimacy - for a long time, can make you feel a bit emotionally detached and distant from the act of sex itself. It can begin to feel mechanical, and eventually unsatisfactory. All of which can add to a feeling of overall discontentment. So know when to back out.
9. It’s an efficient and effective way to deal with stress
Sexual frustration can be a terrible thing. And it can stress you out. The reverse is true too - general stress can also exaggerate feelings of frustration. So going out and just getting laid is super-effective way of dealing with that problem. Sex is a great stressbuster.
10. But people will have opinions
It’s the sad truth of living in the society that we do. People always have opinions about other people, and a sexually active woman is all too often considered a “slut”, dreadful though that word is. So despite it being nobody’s business but yours, if you’re not supremely discreet about your activities, you need to be prepared for a certain degree of gossip and/ or people looking at you askance.
Think things through, and if you’re ready for it, go right ahead. And if you’re not, let no one push you into it. It’s YOUR choice, after all - more power to you! :-)
Images: Shutterstock, Tumblr
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Published on Sep 21, 2015