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‘You've Got Balls’ – Here's Why I Refuse To Take It As A Compliment!

‘You've Got Balls’ – Here's Why I Refuse To Take It As A Compliment!

On a day-to-day basis, I find myself cringing at the platter of obscenities and vulgar language around me. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why the word ‘bitch’ is an insult. I have three puppies who are all girls, and hence, bitches, and literally the cutest things to have inhabited the planet! I don’t get why the female anatomy in itself, or unnatural intercourse with one’s sister or mother, are considered to be great abusive words.  

So a cunt or a pussy, aka a vagina means a stupid or scared person. A man’s scrotum, on the other hand, is put on a pedestal, when even men know for a fact that even the slightest flick of a finger would send them down a spiral of intense pain and agony. How does that imply strong? It did not take me ‘balls’ to lash out at a roadside idiot whose constant stare was making me uncomfortable. The last time I checked, a pouch of testicles was not required for me to ask a guy out first, or for doing just about anything which needed a bit of gumption.

1 you have got balls

I recommend you read British writer Cherry Healey’s candid memoir Letters To My Fanny (Rs 424), which is a funny take on 21st century womanhood.  

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“In my personal experience, I have found the pussy to be one of the strongest things I have ever come across in my life…Have you ever come across a pussy? You realize vaginas can start revolutions and end wars. You realize, even on a physical level, the vagina is one of the strongest things that have ever existed. Virtually indestructible. Many men in this room have tales of how they once defeated the pussy. Let me tell you now, they have not…There’s a reason men have sought to oppress it for so long. The vagina is frighteningly powerful. You realize that human beings come out of a vagina. Human beings come out and still, it continues to work as intended. Do you understand how impressive that is? You’re saying it’s weak? You just sit on a penis wrong and it breaks.

‘Don’t be a penis,’ that should be the phrase. I wish I was a pussy.”

Language is important. I wouldn’t have thought much about the balls compliment had I not heard comedian Trevor Noah (yes, a man) articulate in such good humour that a pussy could basically annihilate the world if it wanted to. Not as much could be said about them balls.

I have had people patronize me from time to time when I tried to reason out with them. Their only rationale is that it is just an insult and I shouldn’t be taking it so seriously. But imagine someone calling you a pussy and you just hit them back with this one line, “Damn right, where the heck do you think you came from?”

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And dear boys, I am not patronizing you or your genitals. But for the love of God, the next time you want to compliment a woman call her brave and beautiful, articulate and strong, tell her that she can make music with her words and the whole world comes to a halt when she chooses to bust out her hip-hop moves.

As for you, if someone calls you a pussy, wear it with pride like your favourite superhero’s cape. Doing anything like a woman is not an insult and once again, I don’t have balls, so if I choose to get my belly pierced tomorrow, my genitals (or their lack thereof) would have zero part to play in the decision. I wouldn’t need my virtual balls for courage or some kind of affirmation.

That’s all, really. Please and thank you.   

2 you have got balls

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This ‘Fight Like A Girl’ Wonder Woman shirt (Rs 499) is a must-have for all your fierce and strong ladies!

Images: Giphy, Shutterstock

17 Sep 2017

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