Sameer and I had been in a relationship for two years already, but my mother still only knew him as a friend, and a “good boy” she could trust to ferry me in and out of home from all those late night parties. We never let her grow suspicious of us, and would act extra “friendly” with each other - and always, always stay at a minimum distance of three steps whenever she was around.
But two years is a long time and you’re probably wondering just how I got away with a boyfriend while living at home with my parents. Well, for one, I had a room to myself, where I could do anything I wanted without ever being intruded on by anybody. And second, I think my parents never really realised that I had grown up enough to have a boyfriend, you know. They thought I was still too young to know or experiment with all the “adult” stuff.
So, it was kinda easy for me to explain late night calls as bestie emergencies and hickies as mosquito bites. And, of course, if anyone in the family discussed “young relationships” I would act bored - only because I could almost hear my parents’ relief at this reaction.
Anyway, so Sameer and I got away pretty well. And because he was the first ever love of my life, I was obsessed with him, and also quite willing to try the joys of the adult world with him.
Now, since I was a kid, I kept journals. I didn’t have any siblings to come back home and share things with - so I would write about everything that made my day, and also the stuff that ruined it. It was mostly about friends and life at school, and then later, life at college. Sameer became a frequently repeated name in the pages, of course. And I would detail everything I felt when he was around. To me, it was the only way of holding on to memories with him that I didn't want slipping away.
And like I told you before, no one ever entered my room and read these diaries. Ever. To be extra safe, I had pushed them back in a corner with old papers that nobody would ever bother with.
I had gone on a trip with friends, when my mom called and said she had read everything!
It was the longest conversation of my life - one that I would have given anything to just stop. Mom said she had gone inside my room to look for a few documents for my Aadhar card registration when she stumbled upon my diaries there instead. First she ignored them. And then, curiosity got the better of her and she started reading. One page after another, till she reached the part where I had elaborately discussed my first kiss and the many, many thrills it left me tingling with, in many previously undiscovered places.
So, over that damned phone call, she read out these thrills to me, again. I didn’t know what to say, except that it was my first kiss and I promise I wouldn’t kiss a boy ever again. I was 19 and super scared that she would narrate the incident to my dad, and so in my desperation I just told her I’d break up with Sameer - like it was a crime to be in a relationship, a crime which I had been caught red-handed committing.
Well, right after that phone call, I did have a super dramatic break up with Sameer too. Don’t blame me for being a kid, my mother was crying on the phone and sounded just so betrayed that I couldn’t come up with anything better to pacify her.
Anyway, at least this incident made my mum realise that her kid wasn’t so much of a kid anymore - and it somehow also made her come to terms with the fact that I may fall in love again. And when love came knocking on my door a second time around, instead of detailing my love life on a page, I edited it in my head and let my mum know about it first. And this time, she took it well.