Small fights, arguments and even sometimes losing your cool at your partner are normal in any relationship. But every relationship and situation has boundaries which one should not cross. Here are a few things no one should settle for in a relationship.
1. Unreasonable amounts of jealousy
Being jealous of the various other girls or even sometimes friends in your partner’s life is normal. We all feel insecure at times, and that’s fine. You want your partner to spend time with you, but he can’t because of other obligations and commitments. At times like those, everyone feels slightly jealous. But making it a habit and having an actual problem with everyone else in your partner’s life, or getting annoyed about everything he does that doesn’t include you, is not okay. And it isn’t okay when you’re at the receiving end of it either. So don’t do it, and don’t put up with it either!
2. Being expected to change who you are
You are an individual, with your own set of beliefs, values and principles. And no matter what they are, you should stand tall and be proud of the person you are. Of course, there is always room for improvement, and so you should be open to listening to constructive criticism. But if it’s just someone outright telling you that you need to change yourself in order to be with him - you don’t need to take it! You’re amazing the way you are and you ought to be with someone who acknowledges that and appreciates you.
3. Unhealthy everyday fighting
Fighting is 100% normal! Yes, every couple has fights - and there is nothing wrong with it. In fact, fighting to a certain extent is healthy. You have issues and you fight to sort them out. But when fighting about anything and everything becomes an everyday thing and you start getting picked on for everything you do, it’s definitely not okay. When fighting ends in a negative result rather than with a solution to make things better, you know you have some thinking to do.
4. Being manipulated into believing it’s always your fault
When angry, everyone tends to look for wrong in others and tries and put the blame on the other person. But when this continues even after the two of you have cooled down and accepted your own faults, it just isn’t right. You can’t clap with one hand, and so when two people fight, there has to be some contribution from both ends. Don’t let someone manipulate you with their words and convince you that you’re wrong every time. You’re not wrong every time you feel bad about something and address it. You’re not wrong for wanting more in or from a relationship. Don’t get carried away by his words. Stay true to what you believe in.
5. Being talked down to
When someone talks to you badly or tries to put you down, you know immediately that there is something wrong. No one has the right to talk down to you - and you should definitely not take it. You are two equals in a relationship, so he has no right to make you feel like you are less than him in anyway. You ought to be with someone who knows you are his equal - and treats and talks to you with respect.
6. Having to do or go through everything yourself
There are two people in a relationship - you and your partner. You’re not alone, therefore, you shouldn’t have to do everything on your own either. You shouldn’t have to feel like the entire relationship depends on you - like your efforts, and your efforts alone are keeping the relationship going. You’re a team - and if it doesn’t feel like it, if you feel like you’re all alone, it isn’t right.
7. Being made to feel like you’re insignificant and unimportant
You are important. Know and remember that. No one should be able to make you feel like you’re not important or that your presence is insignificant - least of all the person you are in love with. If he doesn’t see it, he doesn’t deserve you!
GIFs: Giphy, Tumblr
HAVE A STORY IDEA FOR POPxo? If you want to hear about it, we can write about it! Just tell us your idea here!
MUST-READ: Why You Shouldn’t Compare YOUR Relationship With Anyone Else’s
MUST-READ: 10 Little Secrets To A Really Great Relationship!
Published on Feb 08, 2016