What’s worse than not being able to make a relationship last? A belligerent, nagging ex who keeps coming back to your life – much like an unpleasant cold which you’d thought you got rid of two weeks ago. But sometimes shrugging off and letting go is for the best, really. Here are 10 awesome comebacks for your ex when he says stupid stuff to you and you have run out of effs to give!
1. ‘You won’t believe how many girls like me now. But I still miss you.’
Oh, that’s terrible. I feel sorry for all of them because you are a colossal waste of time.
2. ‘Have you lost weight since the time we broke up?’
Nope. But I’m pretty sure you have lost your mind.
3. ‘It was all your fault.’
Thanks. But I feel the exact opposite.
4. ‘I have a serious problem with your attitude.’
I seriously don’t think that I care.
5. ‘Have you blocked me already? I guess not.’
Give me a second. I am on it.
6. ‘I am at your door. Now you have to give me a second chance.’
Good, stay there. I am away for a vacation and your face will keep the burglars away.
7. ‘Stop being so uptight. I want you back.’
I’d rather kiss a cactus than get back together with you.
8. ‘Can I date that hot friend of yours?’
How do I put it gently? I really don’t care.
9. ‘You will never get someone as good as me!’
Why thank God for that!!
10. ‘Can we friends with benefits?’
Or we could be strangers who have nothing to do with each other.
11. ‘I still have feelings for you.’
Hahahahhahah. I see your sense of humour is getting better.
12. ‘Do you ever miss me?’
NOPE.
13. ‘Can I get your Netflix password?’
Yes. In your dreams, you sure can.
GIFs: Giphy
