Getting into a relationship can both be wonderful and dicey. It becomes complicated if you don’t see eye to eye. The progressive world is choosing to denounce labels and name tags that come with a relationship. Some people end up taking advantage of this fact and keep the other one hanging... If you have been seeing someone for three months or more then this is a good time to bring these topics up and have an honest insight into what is really going on.
Topic No. 1 - Where is this going?
If both of you have decided to live in the present, “to see where it goes”, then maybe you could rule this question out entirely... Because, really, who knows what’s going to happen tomorrow and you should live every day as it comes. But, if you see something serious, if you are unhappy with the “I don’t know” answer lingering in the air, it is high time that you figured out where it is actually going.
Topic No. 2 - How serious is this?
Every relationship has its own unique dynamics and it’s hard to place all relationships into certain set categories. After being with someone for three months, it doesn’t take a genius to decide if one wants to be serious and exclusive with someone or if they just see the relationship as a fling - that may lead to nothing. You have to talk these things out with your partner - if you see it as just a fling then you have no right to keeping him hanging and vice-versa. Define those boundaries!
Topic No. 3 - Is it the sex?
This could work both ways - is great sex the only reason why you two are still together or is it the other way around? Is the lack of sex the reason why it’s not working out? Sex is often difficult to talk about openly, but make an exception! It'll be really helpful.
Topic No. 4 - Do you both support each other's dreams and hopes?
To make any relationship last there has to be a fine balance and you have to support each other. If you feel like you can’t support each other’s dreams in the long run then perhaps it is time to rethink your relationship. Most couples want to support each other’s goals in life but somehow fail to do so because they are vastly different than their own and therefore, difficult to understand. This could later on invite misunderstanding and ego clashes.
Topic No. 5 - What happens if one of you cheats on the other?
Firstly, don’t even go there. And secondly, what happens if either of you do? Even if it a was mistake that happened one night or if it is something that has been happening behind either of your backs... Is there room for forgiveness or are you guys going to part ways, once and for all? Although this is a question that could only be answered when the situation demands it, it is always better to know where you both stand on the subject.
Topic No. 6 - What happens when that serious ex comes back?
Often, there is an ex who we will probably never completely get over. Even if we find closure, that ex will still haunt our thoughts on a rainy day. For some, this ex will just be a memory and won’t pose as a threat while for others, the ex could be someone who could easily slip back into their lives as though they had never left.
Topic No. 7 - Does the past affect anything?
We are just human, we are fallible, we make mistakes. Do the mistakes from the past have space for you guys in the present and the future - and if it does - to what extent? Does it change anything?