Ladies, we gotta admit: you have a strange kind of power over us. Because even when you say some things that are not quite sexual (or even sexy), we just can’t help but make lightning-fast connections in our head that result in a picture of you and us locked in a bedroom, getting down and dirty. So here’s an itty-bitty little list of things that the girls in our lives say that make us think really naughty thoughts!
1. “Just stepped out of the shower.”
Because we’re wondering right now whether you’re still naked. Even if you’re not, we know you were, just a few short minutes ago. Actually, worse is when you say you’re about to step into the shower. Because we know for sure that you’re about to be naked. There’s just nothing else that we can think about right now!
2. You talking about lingerie - in any context.
Whether you’re pointing to something a model is wearing in a magazine or just talking about the day being too hot to bother with a bra, we’re now imagining you in said lingerie. And also about getting you out of it…
3. “I’m in bed.”
Especially if this is in response to a “What’s up?” text early in the morning or late at night. Whether you’re yet to get up or already tucked in, we just feel really, really bad about not having an invitation to be there with you right then
4. Any discussion in which the topic of sex comes up.
Ladies, it doesn’t matter if we’re discussing an arty foreign flick or the mating habits of African lions... What we’re thinking of is making some art with you. Or exploring the mating habits of humans in great detail.
5. “I need a massage!”
You know we love playing amateur masseur, right? You didn’t? Well, now you do. We’re ready to go all out with the warm oil and dim lights and everything. Just please let us make this massage as sensual as possible for you…
6. It’s even more of a mind-is-blown situation if a specific sex act is ever mentioned.
For instance, you know we’re fairly obsessed with the idea of oral sex. Both you going down on us, and us going down on you. So if that comes up in conversation...well, let’s just say that there’s a very naughty little film playing in our imagination right now.
7. “I wish I could have sex right now.”
This rarely happens - because we suspect you ladies are more likely to say this out loud in front of your bestie rather than your boyfriend. But when it does, BOY does it drive us wild. Just knowing that you’re thinking of sex is enough to make us try and move mountains to make it happen right then and there!