Me and my boyfriend Akhil, completed three years together this May. Was reaching this milestone easy, especially when you’re in a distance of almost 1600 kms? No way! But here’s the story behind it.
Before I moved to Chennai for further studies, our relationship was having a lot of trouble. And with the increasing distance, our problems increased too. But it wasn’t just me and him. In our case, there were external elements too. I think when I say I’m not a clingy girlfriend, my boy would accept. But this one girl did shake my grounds.
When I shifted to Chennai, I was mostly surrounded by South Indians and as I couldn’t understand or speak the language, communicating and making friends became pretty hard. Added to that, I was living with new people. On one hand, where hostel life can be filled with madness, it can also be really hard to adjust. So naturally, the frustration of all these things fell on my relationship. Akhil is the sweetest guy you’ll ever meet. And for me, he was never only a boyfriend, he is also my best friend because I could share everything with him.
But he had a really bad temper, especially with all the extracurricular activities that he’d taken on. He had made a close female friend Anavila, who I never had a problem with. He always had female friends and I was completely fine with it. They both would share everything with each other but she thought since we were in a long distance relationship and not at our best time, it was easy to win him over.
She somehow managed to get my contact details and started telling me how Akhil and she were getting close. They would bunk lectures and be at the library and even go out to eat occasionally. And eventually, according to her, he started liking her. And then, I started coming in between them as they were just dying to get together. I must say she really worked darn hard to break us.
And each time I would even utter her name in front of Akhil, he would get irritated. That was quite unlike his characteristic. He was always open to talk about everything with me. But about this, he wouldn’t. That was actually disturbing. What was possibly stop him from talking about her with me?
He was bad at expressing himself and I couldn’t really understand what’s bothering him half the time. And he expected me to understand him and his feelings! It took me months to ask him what was going on and I had to be really patient. My gut told me that he wasn’t cheating on me but my brain needed proof and a concrete answer. He finally opened up to me and told me everything. I was secured for once that he is completely mine because he was irritated by all the stories made by her.
But there was a little more I wanted. I wanted him to confront her and tell her that he is mine. This was the time I started telling him every little thing she ever did to come between us. Akhil was really pissed and that drove him to make it clear to her that we are together and also blast on her for saying everything she said to me. And even now, some days back, she texted me on Facebook saying that Akhil proposed her this year January and she said a yes in March.
She also said, ‘If we ever plan to get married, I’ll make sure we invite you.’ After all this drama, Akhil and I continue to be together, all healthy and deeply in love. It was a rough patch and you’ll cross it soon.’ And the best part? We did! This taught me what not to do in a long distance relationship.
*Names changed to protect privacy.
Images: Shutterstock
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