What Really Happened The First Time I Went Down On A Guy…

We did it in the wrong order, the boy and I. That is to say, we had sex first, oral sex later. Don’t ask me why. It just seemed to happen that way.

We were both virgins before our joint first time. So the first two months after we started sleeping together basically involved us doing it every possible chance. Mostly missionary. But that was exciting enough for us. It was only in the third month that we decided to get experimental and adventurous. Ergo, going down on each other.

No matter what they tell you, boys definitely have the easier task. No gag reflex to worry about, no need to twist your neck in a really awkward angle for long minutes, no spit-swallow dilemma to deal with. Anyway, those are more evolved problems than what happened with me.

The day we decided to finally try oral sex, he ate me out first. And it was really good. A little ticklish and strange to start with, but it worked out pretty great in the end. Then came my turn.

I made tentative efforts at first. A lot of girls have told me that their first time going down on a guy primarily comprised the emotion of “Ew, this is gross!” That was simply not the case with me. After all, I was already willing to put it inside my vagina, so having it in my mouth didn’t seem like a big deal. What really bugged me was trying to figure out how to breathe!

 

I basically had to take a break every 30 seconds or so – which meant he went from fully aroused to not at all turned on several times. Finally, I realized that this was the exact opposite of swimming with my head underwater. I had to remember to keep both my mouth and nose open at the same time. Perform with one, breathe with the other. But by then I was so tired and had such a massive crick in my neck that we had to stop.

We kept ourselves entertained during our break with regular old sex – as was our norm. And then, when I could feel him getting pretty close, I decided to give it another shot.

He was happy enough to try it again. So I pulled off the condom and started at it again. And it was Dis. Gus. Ting.

It wasn’t him – it was the stupid condom! For the first time ever, I truly understood how bad latex actually tastes and smells! Not only did I end up making a completely yuck expression with my face – which completely killed his enthusiasm – but I also had to go rinse my mouth out with Listerine. And then he went and washed himself. By which point we were both so zonked that we gave up.

I’m relieved to say it wasn’t so bad the next time we tried. In fact, it was pretty spectacular, even though I say so myself. We just made sure to start with me going down on him, followed by him going down on me, and finished with intercourse. And over time we discovered flavoured condoms and also learnt to keep wipes and stuff handy for such niggling little problems! 😉

Image: Shutterstock

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