If you're a 20 something girl in this country, you would totally understand the pressure of arranged shaadi that we're all put under. Sometimes it's your own parents who tell you that you're crossing the marriageable age, sometimes it's relatives saying things like "you're next in line" and sometimes it can even be your peers who say things like "c'mon you don't want to be alone your whole life, do you?!" Well, whoever it may be, it gets to you. The only consolation we can give is- gurl you ain't the only one!
They found her a match who was well-settled and lived in the States. They met and connected and she even believed that she could spend the rest of her life with him. So she took the plunge and decided to get engaged after which he went back to America. However, here's where the plot twists.
Sharing her story with We, The People she narrated the entire incident of how it started and how it has ended.
"I was always independent–but my parents just wanted me to get married and settle down. They began searching for guys on matrimonial websites, and to appease them, I went along with it.
In May 2017, a ‘rishta’ came–he was well-settled, from a good family in the US. We began to meet and I genuinely thought of spending the rest of my life with him. We got engaged, and soon after, he went back to America.
But within a month, it all went downhill. We would argue often–he would constantly question me about not picking up his calls, about where I was going and who I was meeting. Initially, I thought he was insecure and possessive, but he started calling my parents to cross-check my whereabouts. He even began to judge my lifestyle and wanted to budget my expenses. I tried telling my parents that I couldn’t deal with him, but they consoled me by saying that it would get better, that he would change.
When the wedding cards started going out, I realised that if I didn’t do something now, I’d never be able to. I called up my best friend in a panic and she only said one thing to me, ‘You can either live the life your parents choose for you, or you can live the life that you want.’
So 2 weeks before the wedding, I went to the airport and got a ticket to Hyderabad. I switched off my phone and got on that flight. When I landed, I picked up my fathers call–my parents were angry, but more than that, they were concerned. They just wanted me home. I refused to go back until they called off the wedding.
But apparently ‘log kya kahenge’ was more important than my happiness–I didn’t know where I stood in their long list of priorities. That’s when my cousins intervened–they made my parents understand the mental trauma I was going through. It took them some time to get my side of the story, but they finally agreed to cancel the wedding. I went back home and the first thing I did was hug them.
Today I’m a 29-year-old, unmarried woman and my parents are fine with that. Because they know I will find the ‘one’, and I will have an amazing wedding but this time it’ll be on my terms. Just to be safe though...I’m going to keep my running shoes ready.”
So ladies, instead of doing something your parents want you to do and getting married only because of societal pressure, do it for yourself and when you think you're ready. We don't want to live a life of regrets now, do we?!
POPxo's first web series 'Unmarried' with associate partner Lifestyle, fashion partner Numero Uno, dating app partner Woo and salon partner Neu Salonz is coming soon. Check out the trailer here. Releasing soon on the POPxo App.
Image Source - We, The People