Marriage is a beautiful tradition and it brings with it some good and some not-so-great surprises. While you can never prepare for all that a wedlock brings with itself, it’s always a good idea to get some clarification on a few things that matter the most – to you both. It’s absolutely essential to set the expectations right, right from the beginning. Here’s a list of things to discuss and questions to ask your partner before taking the plunge.
1. Monies, monies
Whether you are working or taking a break from it after marriage, it’s important to understand how are the funds going to be used, and saved. Who will contribute to what and will there be a joint account or fund for certain things like running the home, etc. A healthy discussion is all it needs and it’ll help the two of you manage expenses easily.
2. Big buys
Having discussed the smaller aspects of finance, try and have a discussion on investments too. From simple mutual funds to bigger property deals or even that luxury car. A couple must be clear on their future goals and the finances for the same.
3. Starting a family
Well, not everyone wants the same things out of life. We all have a plan and it’s important that your better halves know about it. While you both may want to have kids (or not), you need to discuss the time frame for this. Having children is a life changing decision and both the partners must be on the same page for everything to work out fine.
4. Health issues
We’ve heard of instances where one of the partners hid their medical history fearing that the other one may call off the wedding. And that’s a ridiculous thing to do! Your husband/ wife deserves to know your medical history. Whether or not it affects their decision is a secondary issue. You need to take an informed decision, after all, it’s a matter of life and death.
5. The work life balance
Everyone these days needs to put in extra hours in their work, be it a corporate job or a family business. But you both must know and understand that marriage brings with it some expectations. While you both need to take out time for each other, you even need to respect each other’s work and give them their space when required.
6. Life ambition
The question is – how ambitious is your partner? What are his dreams and aspirations and to what level can he rise or stoop to reach there? And are you comfortable with that? Also, would you support him through all of it?
7. The duties
Who will do the groceries? Will there be a maid? Will he drive you to work? Who prepares the meals? Do you get a full-time help? Don’t ignore these questions! Trust us, these issues are super important to get a clarity on. It’ll also help you determine your comfort level in the relationship.
8. The habits
Ah ha! This one is important. From his food preferences to whether he smokes or how often does he drink, you must know it all. It’s good to be aware of all of this instead of finding out later.
9. The family affair
So how important is his family and its extended members for him? Does he care enough, too much or is he ignorant towards his family? How often do you have to visit or socialize together? Understanding this will not only give you an insight into him as a person but also help you figure out all that is expected out of you.
10. The friend zone
It is possible that sometimes your partner is not entirely comfortable with the proximity that you share with one of your friends. Especially, of the opposite sex. It’s best to come out clear on just how comfortable you both are with each other’s friends, guys and girls, and where the line needs to be drawn.
11. Religious beliefs
Whether you share the same religion or not, knowing each other’s level of practice is a crucial thing. How often are rituals followed and are you comfortable with them? It’s a delicate topic but surely one that needs to be discussed.
