I was filled with excitement as I rang the doorbell. As soon as Rahul opened the door he said, “Finally you’re back! Do you have any idea how much I have missed you?”, hugging me tight. He looked into my eyes with a gaze that made me weak in the knees. It felt like he could read my mind. Slowly he brought his face towards mine and kissed my forehead and then my lips.
As we were about to kiss, his phone rang. It was an awkward moment, he quickly took his phone out of his pocket and answered; it was his mom. I went to the balcony.
Rahul was my senior in college. An amazing height of 6’3, a killer smile, dark brown eyes, superb football skills and a charming personality made him the heartthrob of the college. We first met at our college when we were, somehow, selected as partners for a dance event. Soon, we became very good friends. He was the only guy in the college I had a crush on. But, though he considered me a very good friend I wasn’t the love of his life, I knew it well. In short, it was a one-sided love.
“Ritu!” He said after he had finished the call.
“You’re coming for the party,na?”
“Yeah!” I replied and we began talking about random things to forget what had just happened.
At the party we were having a great time dancing to the best of Bollywood numbers. Suddenly the music stopped and Rahul announced, “I have something important to say, or rather confess.” A hush fell over the hall.
“Umm, so you people call me a playboy but now no more flirting and changing girlfriends, because I’ve fallen in love!” As soon as I heard those last few words, my heart started to beat faster.
Millions of questions started running through my already puzzled mind, “Love,how? Who’s the girl? Maybe he just likes her and he has misinterpreted it as love? What the hell will I do now? Is there no hope?”
“Okay!” He said breaking the suspense, and kneeling down in front of me, “I understood my feelings when you went away, Ritu will you please be mine forever, I love you.”
The world had stopped for me, “I love you,too!” I blurted out as soon as I realise what had just happened.
Soon the news of our relationship went viral and we became the hot topic of the college gossip.
Our love life was no less than a fairytale until he shifted to Delhi for his job while I was in Kolkata. Everything was going fine in the beginning, we were making our long-distance relationship work with Skype and Whatsapp. But as time passed, things started changing. Our love got lost as he started struggling in the professional world. He became an absolute workaholic, the lack of time started creating problems. Often he would vent out his work related frustration at me. He became moody and would often not call me or even reply to my texts.I gradually understood that this relationship was getting too difficult to maintain; I started feeling like I was the only one who was trying hard, really hard to sustain it.
Finally I dropped a text saying, “We need to talk!”
Yes, this time he called me back at night, “Hey sweety, how are you?”
As soon as heard the that loving voice, tears immediately started rolling down my cheeks. But I had to have this talk so I said, “See, things can’t go on like this”
He understood what exactly was bothering me, “Things here aren’t as easy as you think. I stay alone and I have to handle my work and other important things, I am not being able to balance everything right. Time will teach me everything.”
I simply told him, “If I don’t fall into the category of your ‘important things’, then maybe we should rethink our relationship. Moreover, if three months weren’t enough, then you will never be able to balance things.”
He replied, “You know it very well that nobody can take your place in my life…you’re the perfect one for me!” in a pleasing tone, trying to calm me down.
“Let’s not get into an argument and call off the relationship. The rest will go as destiny would have it. Bye” I hung up. This was our last conversation.
Initially after the breakup, I would feel lost and hurt… I could never get over the sentence in which I didn’t come up as the important things in his life. We felt we were made for each other but we couldn’t sustain our relationship. A relationship should make one happy and not add to the stress in one’s life, and in our case the latter was happening.
It has been two years since we last spoke to each other (we don’t even wish each other on birthdays). I don’t regret being in a relationship with him, we were in love and had the best time together but it couldn’t last forever.
Now I am happy in my own life and his social media updates suggest likewise for him. If we were meant to be together we would have surely been together but I saw no point in continuing with a relationship which had started to feel like a struggle and hence I chose to end it.
Not all love stories are meant to be forever. It is better to let go before it leaves indelible scars on the heart and the soul.
* Names changed to protect privacy.
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