Today, on the third day of the brand new year, a men’s rights NGO made it a point to ‘make waves’. We live in times where learning and dissipating information is simple. It literally only takes a few clicks. So it’s particularly concerning when we can’t even do THAT right. A recent post by the ‘Save Indian Family Foundation’ is just one instance that proves it. The Men’s Rights NGO posted a cartoon, further describing how women are a burden on men. The intent was to talk about how alimony plays out – with information that was factually incorrect.
Normally I’d argue: the fact that women are a burden is sheer misogyny but clearly, enough has been said about it and we’re still here. I also feel that it is wasted effort, that women have to constantly ask for things and only get disappointment in return. “Deewar mein sar maarna,” comes to mind. When people called out the page, it asked them to look at “logic”, so that’s precisely what I’m going to do. With due respect (and logic), why is it that when men ask for things, they want something taken away from women? That cannot possibly sound fair.
As a spectator, it only looks like the group considers women its enemies. Other times it feels like they’re so drunk on power that they cannot digest women wanting or asking for equality. If you’re on top of a pyramid scheme, you wouldn’t call it scam. Patriarchy is a lot like that. So this NGO woke up and realized that women getting alimony after a divorce is something that hurts them. They explained and added: “The post means alimony is 1 crore or 120,000 USD for an ordinary man in India, if his wife wants to break the marriage. If the man fails to pay 120,000 USD within 2 months, then he gets 3-4 different court cases. He has to spend rest 7-8 years fighting these court cases.”
Another user pointed out that this was false information, which is problematic given how it can easily be misleading.
It’s scary that a legit group of activists need to rely on derogatory cartoons and false claims to get attention. And this is about getting attention at this point, because there’s strategy to it. You understand the point and motive of a message with how it’s packaged. In this case, for instance, if we properly look at the ‘agenda’ through other posts of the platform, there is a clear pattern. More than being demeaning, it’s about not letting women to a place where they are treated as equals.
Let’s just face it, when a statement is packaged with a hashtag that reads ‘one crore alimony’, people are going to fall for it – which isn’t harmless. It also bothers me that men push equality when it helps them. For such a group, it’s about convenience. Tell a woman to pay for her own things because she wants equality, take it away when it comes to dividing emotional and physical labor at home. So let’s view these agendas for what they are – a means to not let women find equality – a way to take away what they have fought for. Because if taking a stand for men comes at the cost of ruining it for women, then it’s not really activism.
What is really problematic is the fact that so many things could actually bring change or raise important issues – to help men. However, when information is imparted to orchestrate hate for one group, it cannot exactly be looked at as a way to help the other.
