Diana’s Life May Have Been The Living Embodiment Of Women’s Suffering

There’s an inherent sadness associated with being a woman; and as bleak as it sounds, it’s the truth. The world is an unfair place, and it hardly ever gets better. As much as we’d like to look at the brighter side, the constant treatment leaves no space or scope to do that. There’s perpetual dejection, and it comes in different ways for different women. This is what came up when I was discussing Diana’s life with my colleague. We wanted to talk about her, write something about the woman, her work and what she was – but we couldn’t stop talking about how she deserved so much more.

Her life was bits and pieces of everything that goes wrong for women. To be a living embodiment of something as unfair is truly disheartening. She was talented, smart, probably a lot of fun, and on top of everything showed more empathy than the entire royal family has managed to, in all this time. As much as she built a life of her own after the divorce, Diana never got the chance to move away from the mistreatment.

In an interview after her engagement with King Charles, a reporter mentioned that the couple looked “very much in love”. To this day, people talk about Charles’ reaction – the remark, where he responded with a “whatever in love means.” For a woman who had left her home and life behind, it isn’t exactly the nicest thing to hear. It’s scary to know that your partner may not be as much in love as you are. Any which way, women do more, especially in a relationship. To KNOW that you’re never going to be equals in a marriage is as shattering as it sounds. It’s never a nice feeling to love more than the other person.

However, this was also not just that. Most women end up losing their identity in a marriage, particularly because they have to readjust themselves according to an entirely new family. It starts with losing our names, but it never ends there. For Diana, it was not only about the responsibilities that came with being crowned the Princess of Wales. She was also expected to behave a certain way at all times, and constantly hide her personality – because that’s what royalty demands. In her 1995 BBC interview, she opened up about how Charles and the royal family didn’t appreciate the attention that she was getting from people and the media. It’s just more proof that female success is never cause for celebration, it’s always looked at as something negative.

When Diana was mistreated by the royal family, it certainly meant a lot of loneliness. To express your issues as a woman, is already hard to begin with – and when you’re sidelined, you view yourself as the misfit. It’s almost like blaming yourself for someone else’s incapacities. No one really talks about the consequence of an unhappy marriage, especially if you’re forced to stay in it. Diana had referred to her eating disorder a symptom of the marriage that she was in. When she was honest about it, in wanting to be real with people, the royal family not only brushed it under the carpet, but also deemed it hysteria. Women’s mental health is never a subject of empathy – they’re never offered compassion – and to call these issues hysteria is as terrible as it can get.

Diana had also talked about it, where she said: “My husband put his hand on my waistline and said, ‘Oh, a bit chubby here, aren’t we?’ and that triggered off something in me, and the Camilla thing.” No woman deserves that, no living being does. Of course, though, husbands keep coming up with these “funny” remarks that almost always affect the woman’s confidence. Diana dealt with all of that and more. Her life was a spectacle for the world, and it was never appreciated. She did so much, and got nothing in return. If that doesn’t sound like every woman ever, then I don’t know what does.

For us, the struggle never ends; but it’s frightful to imagine a life where a woman faced everything that can go wrong for women.