As a teenager, I remember watching countless Bollywood films and treating them as the holy grail of love and romance. In a country where even today uttering the word sex can shock your parents, Hindi films were/are full of euphemisms, metaphors and confusing sequences.
While there are a number of BS things that Bollywood has taught me about sex, I made a list of the ones that bother me even today. So, let’s get to it!
Foreplay Means Neck Kisses, That’s All
If you are a massive Shah Rukh Khan fangirl, then you totally know what I am talking about! To those who are a little confused, allow me to explain—back in the 90s and early 2000s all Bollywood films depicted neck kisses as an essential part of intimacy. While most films avoided smooching scenes, neck kissing was not just acceptable but glorified. While neck kisses surely work for some people, that’s not all there is to foreplay.
No One Needs To Talk About Condoms/Birth Control Pills
In one of the world’s most populous countries, uttering the word condom is actually far riskier than saying Voldemort in Hogwarts. I can hardly remember any film, which dealt with the subject of condoms, birth control pills or emergency contraceptive pills. In fact, there was never a conversation about safe sex!
A Glass Of Milk = Libido Boost
Every staple suhagraat scene in Bollywood has three things—an overeager groom, coy bride and a glass of milk. For decades, Bollywood films have been treating milk as some magic libido booster. NGL, I always wondered what if the groom was lactose intolerant?
Have Sex Today, Get Pregnant Tomorrow
Everyone knows Bollywood films often forget about the rules of science! In so many Hindi flicks, right after one night of lovemaking, the heroine gets pregnant. How is that even possible? Did most Bollywood filmmakers skip Biology classes altogether? It takes at least two weeks for even doctors to confirm the pregnancy. R.I.P logic!
Flowers Blooming, Bees Stinging And Other Metaphors
Indian society has a prudish attitude when it comes to sex and our cinema reflects that. As a result, many Bollywood movies are filled with metaphors that hint at sex without actually showing anything. In the 1960s and 70s, sex was presented by things like flowers blooming, bees sitting on the flowers, river streams coming together and other random things.
No Questions About Consent But Rape Scenes Are Okay
One of the worst things about sex scenes in Bollywood films is how they used rape scenes to titillate the masses. Not just that, women were constantly objectified and rape was presented as a result of their ‘bad’ habits like wearing revealing outfits, drinking and smoking. Moreover, there were no conversations about consent in films!
For Women, It Is All About The Izzat
This one is a personal pet peeve! In many (honestly way too many) Bollywood films, the lead heroine is shown as someone with no sexual autonomy. She is expected to preserve her virginity as some form of virtue or izzat. However, the hero of the film is not treated in the same way. This is honestly really sexist!
I am honestly glad to see how much Bollywood has evolved when it comes to depicting sex! Let’s hope we never go back to the birds and bees days…
Feature Image Credit: Pinterest
