If you have come out of a bad relationship and wondering how you missed all those red flags from the start, then sis, you’re not alone. Sadly, a lot of us are not able to spot those warning signs in a relationship or in our partners until it’s too late. And, let’s not blame it on love for a change. That sweet little emotion has never asked us to go blind. Nope, that terrible decision is truly on us. And Bollywood. Yep, you read that right. Blame the Indian cinema for glorifying toxic relationships and god-awful lovers for ages now. Can you imagine that I was looking for a Rahul to my Anjali for years before I realised that his character in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai was problematic? I mean, if your feelings for me can change as quickly as my clothes, then boy, bye.
And, that’s just the beginning of it. Yep, that’s how bad (and sad) the situation is. We have been tricked into believing for the longest that creepy romance is love. It’s time to change that. Stalking, gaslighting, and forcing someone is NOT love. Indian filmmakers did their best to glamourise it on-screen and now, we gotta understand why it’s wrong. So that we are able to spot the red flags in relationships and save ourselves all the trouble IRL.
9 Problematic Movies With Major Relationship Red Flags
Ladies, get ready to take notes because we have listed the most problematic movies that you can watch this weekend. They will teach you about all the warning signs that you need to look out for in a relationship.
P.S. We are doing all of us a favour here and not mentioning Kabir Singh that was obviously problematic from the very start. We are instead calling out the movies that tried to sell toxic love as the ideals ones. They are the truly dangerous ones (and educational in this purpose).
Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani
Bunny (Ranbir Kapoor) didn’t deserve Naina (Deepika Padukone). And, if you ever find a man like him, run. In the opposite direction. Let’s leave aside the fact that he was selfish, a bad friend, and someone who was scared of confrontations. And focus on this—he asked Naina’s friend (Rana Daggubati) to leave without her permission. He threw a fit because she was chilling with another guy and handled the situation like a kid. Wow, possessive much?
TBH, I think Naina should have channelised her inner Pooja and told him, “You do not tell me what to do… Get off, my back!” Sadly, she didn’t ‘coz it’s Bollywood! And also, what was that entire thesis where Bunny explained that girls like Naina were meant for love and Lara (Evelyn Sharma) for flings? Argghh!
Ae Dil Hai Mushkil
We don’t have a problem with one-sided love. But this movie teaches us how to spot red flags in a guy who claims to love us. Is he guilt-tripping you for not reciprocating his love? Is he being manipulative and trying to make you jealous unnecessarily? Is he villainising you for hurting his feelings? If yes, then that guy is defs Ayan (Ranbir) from Ae Dil Hai Mushkil and no girl, you don’t need to be another Alizeh (Anushka Sharma).
One of the biggest red flags in any relationship is the inability to understand consent.
R…Rajkumar
“Achi baatein kar li bahut, ab karunga tere sath gandi baat.”
Oh boy, where do we begin? Again, leave aside the problematic things that were way too obvious in the movie such as stalking and forcing. Let’s focus on the fact that Romeo (Shahid Kapoor) believed that he had to win Chanda (Sonakshi Sinha) from the villains. Umm… Red flags alert! Women are not a game or object that someone can ‘win’.
Also, if you’re turning into a damsel like Chanda and counting on your Romeo to save you from distress all the time, then that’s equally problematic. Co-dependency can lead to unhealthy relationships.
Raanjhanaa
The boy who is slitting his wrist for you and pursuing you relentlessly (despite your refusal to be with him) is not the boy in love. He is toxic and someone who needs therapy. Honestly, it doesn’t matter if people think that Kundan (Dhanush) was a true lover and Zoya (Sonam Kapoor) was heartless. The fact remains that unhealthy obsession is lethal and not romantic. Stay the hell away from such peeps.
Kal Ho Naa Ho
If your partner is not letting you make your own decisions or manipulating you into doing things according to them, then they’re problematic. NGL, my heart broke when Aman (Shah Rukh Khan) died in the movie. But, who the hell gave him the right to sabotage Naina’s (Preity Zinta) love life? I mean, she could decide for herself, right?
No noble cause in the world can justify such behaviour. And what’s up with the whole 6-din-ladki-in plan? Disgusting!
Aashiqui 2
You are neither your partner’s rehab centre nor you are their babysitter. Don’t be an Aarohi (Shraddha Kapoor) and don’t put up with any Rahul’s (Aditya Roy Kapoor) unhealthy addictions. It’s not your job to change them.
Mujhse Dosti Karoge!
Let’s get one thing clear once and for all—if your partner is making you jealous intentionally, then probably they’re not mature enough for a real relationship. Also, nine out of ten times, there’s a third person getting hurt because of their shitty games. The inability to respect someone’s emotion is a major warning sign. Noticed how Raj (Hrithik Roshan) casually broke Tina’s (Kareena Kapoor) heart to make Pooja (Rani Mukerjee) fess up her love. How cruel was that?! Also, their relationship taught us to stop prioritising looks over inner beauty.
Devdas
Ishhh-top it. Stop it now. Dev Babu (SRK) was toxic and that’s the end of it. Don’t ever assume that a guy who wants to control your life, humiliates you, and cannot handle his emotion like an adult can be in a healthy relationship.
Rehnaa Hai Terre Dil Mein
What more can we say when the movie’s actress herself said that the film had sexist elements in it. Dia Mirza, who played Reena, recently said in an interview with a leading daily, “People were writing, thinking and making sexist cinema, and I was a part of these stories. Rehnaa Hai Terre Dil Mein has sexism in it.”
TBH, it’s not rocket science and quite simple actually. If you like someone, go and talk to them. If they say they aren’t interested, leave them alone. Don’t stalk them like Maddy, don’t lie and manipulate, do not hurt someone’s feeling, and for god’s sake, don’t threaten them into loving you back. You see these signs in a relationship, that’s your cue to leave right away!
Thank us later peeps!
Also Read: Best movies on friendship
Feature Image: Instagram
