The thing is that there's a stereotype around in-laws, mothers-in-law in particular which dictate that they're horrible, mean, possessive, terrible, sadistic people. But that's not the case. I think this stereotype was perpetrated by Indian soaps where the bahu was always a docile, family loving, shy girl, dedicated to the needs of her husband and his family while the saas could never remember her time as a bahu and would spend her entire day making her daughter-in-law's life a living hell.
When I got married, this was what I was the most scared of. Well, not that my in-laws would be the devil in human forms but just that I wouldn't be able to mingle with them. To my surprise, it wasn't the case at all.
I moved in with my husband into his ancestral house and fit in right off the bat. My mother-in-law doted on me and treated me like her own daughter and my father-in-law pampered me to the hilt. While my husband and I went to work every day, they made sure the chores around the house were done and we were never uncomfortable.
So, now you get my dilemma?
I absolutely love my in-laws but I can't live with them for various reasons that have nothing to do with the way they treat me.
Walking into the kitchen, cleaning it on my own, cooking a meal for two are all luxuries only people living on their own can afford. Well, I want to get things made according to my own preference- you understand what I say when I say every ghar ka khana tastes different?
Okay, right now, I and my husband only have our bedroom to get naughty in and the bathroom when we have time. But I really want to get down and dirty on the countertop, on the couch outside, on the kitchen slab- everywhere. Also, I want to be loud and make as much noise as I want, is that too much to ask for?
Yes, they've done everything in their power to make me feel comfortable and at home but it still seems like I'm a guest in their house. I shifted into my husband's room and the house is full of things that are close to them- there is a slight discomfort about the whole thing in me.
I absolutely love interior design and doing up spaces is something that gives me great joy. So I really want to find a place that is true to me and my husband and I can do it up with love and make it into a space that screams out our personalities.
Okay, this may seem weird to some of you but there's a certain joy in walking around the house naked. It's your private space and you can do as you wish. But of course, my husband and I will get to enjoy around the way we want to, don't see the problem with that.
You see, me not wanting to live with my in-laws has more to do with me than them.
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