No matter how long you’ve known or been with your partner, marriage does make every one of us nervous. As the years pass by, you discover new things about your partner, you both change as individuals and so does your relationship. And if there is one thing people are most curious about it is how your sex life changes. Well, sex is extremely important and the common perception is that your sex life takes a dip after the first year of marriage. WRONG!
I’ve been married for almost five years and been with my husband for over eight years now. Our sex life has changed, but it’s not all bad. And I’m going to tell you exactly what it’s like. But first, it’s very important to know that it’s different for everyone. How your chemistry changes over the years differ from couple to couple. Here’s my experience:
1. It does get easier
You don’t have to try as hard to figure out what works because you understand your partner’s body. You tend to pick up on those little tells in each other’s body language that signal what he/she wants. You get better at predicting what’s coming next and know exactly how to respond.
2. You’re more open to experimenting
Stemming from the first point is the fact that you’re both more open to experimenting. You trust your partner completely and are open to trying newer, more risque stuff. In fact, you want to do it ‘cuz after years of vanilla sex, you’re finally ready to spice things up.
3. You’re less self-conscious…
About how your body looks, about that tiny little scar or even how your mouth smells if you get into the act first thing in the morning or right after a meal!
4. …But sometimes that also means that you’re not putting in as much effort
An effort to wear something sexy or an effort to maybe seduce your partner. I loved buying new lingerie or dressing up for a night of love-making, but I feel all that’s taken a back seat now. And these little things can make a huge difference to your sex routine.
5. The frequency does reduce
It’s not as much to do with the years of marriage but to do with the hectic lifestyle. My husband and I both have challenging job roles and we both work long hours and late nights. Add to this household responsibilities and you’re left with absolutely no time and energy!
6. Communication is so much better
Do you know why almost every sex article you’ve ever read has a point about communicating with your partner about your likes and dislikes? ‘Cuz it is super important and really contributes to having a satisfying time in bed. And after years of living together, my husband and I are not shy or awkward to express ourselves in bed. In fact, dirty talking has never been better!
7. The excitement is still the same
Of course. Why would you ever doubt that! You may not be having it as often, you may not be putting in as much effort to dress up or to do up the ambiance but sex is still exciting. The connection that you and your partner have is stronger than ever and that really makes lovemaking exciting every single time. And if you ever feel like it’s fizzling out, here are some amazing tips.
Images: Giphy, Unsplash
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