Sexting, in layman language, means sending, receiving or forwarding explicit messages to someone and getting them in return. This is usually done on an electronic device like a mobile phone or a computer/laptop. And now that we've gotten the technicalities out of the way, let's talk about how amazing it is to be able to send random sexual messages to someone, and feel satisfied even when the person isn't around. Now, let's see how all of this started, shall we?
Did you know that the first ever mention of the word 'sexting' was in an Australian daily way back in 2005? It was the first time that someone actually broke down the real meaning of the term sexting in three different forms. It originally started with the advent of smartphones and with time (and more internet plans) it started becoming really popular. Even today, it is known to be one of the most popular forms of exchanging naughty conversations between two people who are attracted to each other. It is most common among adolescents who have just started exploring their sexuality. However, adults also don't shy away from the activity.
Sexting is known to make couples really comfortable with each other. It also strengthens the bond between two people especially when they don't live together. Sexting also ensures you speak your express your sexual fantasies to the other person, and speak your mind. It also effectively strengthens your sex life, and a lot of couples turn to sexting to spice things up. So, if you open up about your sex life and fantasies, you also become more comfortable speaking your mind in daily life.
Also, sexting isn't just for couples who are in a relationship. Even if there are two people who have mutually agreed to be with each other physically, they turn to sexting to get to know each other's preferences in bed. And, for good reason, because who doesn't want to find out what their partner enjoys in bed? It's always good to have someone know what you really want in bed and be able to deliver what THEY really want, no matter what the status of your relationship is.
So, it's safe to say that sexting is something that two people choose to indulge in, but it's not dependent on the kind of relationship that two people have. In the longer run, sexting can turn into a fun activity that a couple enjoys regularly. However, a forced form of sexting in any kind of relationship is trouble. But, more on that later.
Like we said, sexting if done with full consent by mature adults in any kind of relationship is okay. Two people, whether in a relationship or not with each other can indulge in healthy sexting if they feel like. Assuming these two people are adults and know what they are actually doing, there is nothing wrong with it. If you know the risks involved and you know what you're getting into, and you've taken the necessary precautions, then you're honestly doing good. So, looking for your ultimate sexting guide? We're here to help you with some tips and tricks!
We love you and we want to make sure you're doing it right. So, whether you're in a long-term relationship, have just started a new one or are simply indulging in a meaningless fling with someone you like, here are a few tips and tricks that will totally come in handy when you're sexting someone.
1. It is actually an easy way to make your partner's fantasies come to life. It makes them open up to you in many ways.
2. It's a great way to give or receive compliments from your partner. Imagine being told that they love your curves or lips? Good feeling, isn't it?
3. It is also a subtle way of saying that you are open to heating things up between the sheets. If you are the shy type, this will be the best way to tell your partner what you crave for in bed.
4. All the teasing will make you scream and beg for more. It will also make you anticipate the next move in the bedroom. Imagine thinking about it?
5. It can happen anywhere. You don't have to pick a time or place. That's the beauty of it.
6. It lets your partner know that they are wanted. Imagine reaching out to them and telling them that you want all of them. A great way of turning around a dull day at the office.
7. It initiates an open communication with your partner no matter what. Being able to say it in a text means being able to say it in person too.
1. The first thing to do is set the mood right. This involves text messages like "You know what I feel like doing to you" or "You know what we should do in bed". Open with the right line so your partner knows that you are in the mood to start a naughty conversation.
2. Compliment your partner after they know you are in the mood. It is very important for them to know that you like them and want them, especially at that moment. Tell him the one thing that he does to you, which you like. Things like "Baby you make me feel so hot when you do ---" should do the work.
3. Don't rush things, instead take them as they come. Wait for the right time and be gradual in your approach.
4. If you like something, ask for it. Maybe your partner is waiting for you to express yourself. Take the lead when required, and let them know what you like. You can also say things like "Do this to me" in order to talk about your fantasies in a more assertive way.
5. Always, always, and always make sure you don't mix conversations up. This might sound like the most obvious advice ever but honestly make sure you send your message to the right person. You don't want your colleague to respond with "ahan, what?" when you send him a naughty text.
6. It's always good to initiate if you're more in the mood. Taking the lead sometimes can actually lead to great conversations, honestly.
7. No matter what you say or do, make sure you are super duper confident in your approach. This will not only help you have a conversation without a filter but will also help your partner be confident. It helps to decrease the awkwardness that is usually common during sexting.
8. It is very important to set the scene before you start the scene. If you're picking a time right after a shower then make sure you let him know. The whole point is to have yourself prepared to be in the moment so things heat up.
9. It's really important to be uninhibited while sexting with your partner. Let your imagination run wild, and let them know every thought you have. Communication is key, and being honest will hold your conversation together.
10. Use your emojis right. Emojis play a very important role when you're sexting because sometimes you want to say something without having to actually say it. Emojis come in handy at this time and trust us, they do wonders.
11. When you're sexting, make sure that you give your partner a heads up. Especially if you're sending him a picture. You don't want him to open it at the wrong time, and definitely not in front of the wrong person.
12. Once you're in the mood and at it, make sure you still have every bit of reality in place. Even though we encourage you to let your imagination run wild, you still need to have a bit of reality floating around.
13. Try and be spontaneous, and don't be lazy with your replies once you've started. No one wants to wait for hours for a naughty text. Be available and do not even think about ghosting when you're in the process.
We feel you, and sometimes just like you, we need some inspiration too. So, we picked, and made up, a few sexting examples that will come in handy next time you want to get down and dirty, virtually!
1. "I had a naughty dream last night. YOU were in it and I really want to tell you what it was about."
2. "You know what I feel like doing right now? YOU."
3. "Just took a hot shower. You know what would be hotter? YOU with me in it."
4. "I really like how you kiss me on my neck, it turns me on like nothing else."
5. "I am thinking about you. Naked."
6. "You know what's yummy? Chocolate sauce on you."
7. "If I let you do anything to me, what would you do. RIGHT NOW?"
8. "I came to work without wearing panties today. God! I wish I was working with you."
9. "Just had my food. I could totally use you for dessert. With a topping of whipped cream."
10. "I can actually imagine my tongue on you. Exploring your body will be the best thing right now."
11. "I am thinking about you right now and I am naked. Think you can do something about it?"
12. "Go to the bathroom and send me a picture of you without your pants. I could use some of you today."
13. "Touching myself and thinking about you right now."
14. "I love to touch your butt when you're in me, but since you're not right now, can I just get a picture?"
15. "I love those pants on you. Wish I could take them off RUN!"
16. "I'm wearing your favourite bra today. Think you can take it off?"
17. "I'm putting on my black thong while writing this message to you."
18. "Remember the last time you made me scream in bed? I need a repeat performance today."
19. "What's your ultimate sexual fantasy? I'm feeling generous today."
20. "I'm going to take my time with you today. By the end of it, you'll be begging me to stop."
Did any of these come in handy? Well, now that you have a clear knowledge of what you should say when you're sexting, we have also made a list of things that you should definitely not say. Give this a read because it is as important as knowing what to say.
You are just going to ruin the mood and get the other person really excited before the real deal. Sexting is mostly for situations when you want to get down and dirty but you can't. So, the whole purpose is defeated when you sext right before having sex.
If you're in the mood to sext it doesn't mean the other person is. Sexting can only be enjoyed if both of you are into it. So, make sure your partner is on the same page before you send a sext. Give him a little warning or hint, especially before sending him a nudie.
Sexting is not always between two people who love each other, it can be between two consenting adults who choose to have some fun. However, it still does involve some trust and connection between two people. So, if you don't trust someone, don't initiate a dirty conversation with them.
So, here is the thing - nobody wants to read an essay. People wish to be quick and get off reading simple sentences. Don't make it a lengthy conversation, and try to keep it short and simple.
Nobody wants to read your dirty messages. Make sure you turn off your pop-up notifications before you start sexting. It not only protects your privacy but will also save you a lot of embarrassment.
You want to keep your sexting game natural. Adding too many filters will only waste time, and make your pictures look artificial. It's an absolute no no to send a picture to someone which has no 'you' element. Keep it simple and natural.
Know that sometimes people have access to your phone, and you don't want them to see things that are personal to you and your partner.
Sometimes, a few words do the trick for you, and we want to make sure that you have the right set of words. Words like want, need, you, me are most commonly used by most couples when they're sending sexy messages to boyfriend or their partner. Lick, kiss and 'do this to me' are also one of the most commonly used phrases that make it really easy to frame your sentences when you're sexting someone.
It has been seen that couples reap a lot of benefits from sexting. Sexting helps couples strengthen their ties since it forces them to open up about their personal life and fantasies. Sometimes, you can't express your needs to your SO in person but you can take be honest over text.
And, not only that, but sexting has also reportedly helped couples strengthen their long lost bond. Sex has the power to bring two people closer if they've been feeling distant, which is why sexting is a step towards making things comfortable and sexy between two people.
Not just sexually, sexting helps couples connect on an emotional level too. This is one of the most important aspects of sexting. You end up telling each other your personal and intimate thoughts and trust each other with information. This, in turn, helps you bond with them emotionally too.
If you're a parent, there are a lot of decisions you need to make on a daily basis. From figuring out when is the right age to give children smartphones to 'having the talk' about sex, there's nothing easy about being a parent.
As a parent, your child's teenage years will the toughest. You can't constantly keep a watch them, and you're constantly switching roles between parent and friend. The important thing to remember is that you need to trust your child, and also educate him or her about right and wrong.
Adolescents are more likely to indulge in sexting because they're curious about their bodies. They start learning about their sexuality and want to explore it as much as they can. For some children, sexting is a way of exploring their own sexuality and getting to know more about the sexuality of someone they like. This needs to be dealt with the utmost sensitivity. So, here are a few tips that will come in handy if you've got a child who's curious about sex at this point.
It's okay for your child to be sexually curious, that's natural. All you need to do is have a frank conversation and teach them the difference between right and wrong. Remember, you were curious once, you just didn't have access to all things 'smart'.
Children need to be told that it's okay to go through a certain phase in their life. However, being careful and knowing who to trust is very very important. You need to talk to them and gain their confidence so that they confide in you.
Kids at this age may feel pressured considering all the changes they're going through. As parents, you need to remind them of their worth so that they don't have any self-doubt. Underconfidence, insecurities, there are lots of feelings that kids experience at this age, so make sure you vocalize how special they are.
If your partner is into sexting, you'll see the signs. Whether it involves him saying kinky things to you in the middle of the day or whenever you guys get together, or him sending you sexy pictures and naughty jokes, you know he's willing to take the conversation forward if he does that often. There is nothing wrong with wanting to sext with your partner, and if he does these things, know that he likes it, and wants to do it more often.
With emojis at the centre of all conversations these days, it's no surprise that they've managed to make their way into sexting as well. So, here are all the emojis you should be using in your next sext.
This is by far the most basic sexting emoji out there. It's meant for a fun and flirty conversation and mostly to acknowledge what your partner says. Wink with them in agreement and let them know you're up for more.
This emoji means penis in the sexting world. So if you want to tell your man that you need him now, this one will definitely come in handy.
Peach means butt. So, you can use this emoji to compliment someone's butt or even better, to sext about anal. See how
Tongue means you want to experiment with your tongue on your partner. It may also mean that you want to lick your partner or that you want to french kiss. You can use this emoji however you like.
Sex is on fire? Well, if you are looking to have a flaming experience with your partner then this is the best emoji for you. This can be used to indicate that you want them hot or that you want them to be hot with you the next time you're at it.
This emoji simply means an orgasm. So, you can use it to tell the other person that you are climaxing or that you want to climax while having a hot sex chat with him. This is sometimes also used to describe sweaty sex.
Sexting is considered a warm-up to the real action. So, a lot of couples use this as foreplay before their real session. However, for couples who are in a long-distance relationship, sexting is their only alternative to real sex. Receiving a sext in the middle of the day can be fabulous for your sex life. It's a great way of indulging in foreplay when the two of you are not together. How hot is that?!
Being in a long-distance relationship can get a little lonely sometimes. Sometimes, you long for the person to be right next to you for comfort or for intimacy, and you can't really have that when you're in a long-distance relationship. That's why sexting comes in handy. A kinky text or picture can actually remind your partner what they're missing out on, and strengthen that bond because you're physically away from each other.
Sexting between partners needs to be consensual, and if one of them is not comfortable then there is no reason why they should continue to do it. Sexting is one of the activities that could spice things up in a relationship, but it isn't the only one. You can always have a conversation with your partner and tell them how you feel about it. If sexting isn't your cup of tea, talk to your partner and figure out what's the activity that gets both of you excited.
In the end, every couple has their own views on sexting. Some like it, some don't, and some really really like it. So, if the two of you like it and know the right way to do it, then go ahead. If you feel forced under any form of pressure then talk to your partner. One should never have to do anything that they're not comfortable doing. Until then, happy sexting!
This story was updated in January 2019.
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