We're always comparing love marriages and arranged marriages. It's almost as if there is a competition between the two to prove which one is better. While Team Love Marriage says that it's a natural progression and you're marrying somebody you are deeply and passionately in love with, Team Arranged Marriage maintains that love can be found in unexpected places, even if your parents served it to you on a platter.
But the question I often ask these people is why does there have to be a competition? Both of these have their pros and cons and while love marriages may seem the best route, I've seen enough arranged marriages work out amazingly well too. That's why when I saw this thread on Quora, I had to share it with you guys. People have discussed how sex is different in a love marriage and in an arranged one and here's what they had to say!
"Sex has the same issue in terms of pleasure, timing, positions, desire, will, consent, orgasm, a way of sex beyond the type of marriage whether it's a love marriage or arranged marriage. Actually, there is the difference in sex between 'love' & marriage.
In love, sex is celebrating each other's bodies at maximum level as it's their love to enjoy. In marriage, sex is the consumption of each other's bodies as it's their right to consume.
In love, sex only happens after will, consent & on desire, while sex in marriage happens without consent, will & even without desire many times.
In love, couples always focus on comfort & pleasure of the other partner while in marriage one always focus on own pleasure.
In love, couples always try to do in different positions to get more pleasure while in marriage primary concern is to get finished it as early as possible so the position has no value."
"In a love marriage, you know the person very well and maybe you've already tried sexual activities.
In an arranged marriage, you don't know the person. So sexual activities will starts after you know him/her.
Sex is pleasant after you know each others body, feelings and needs (what he/she like in sexual activities)."
Believe it or not, it’s not as comfortable as in arranged marriages.
Girls have a choice to reject it.
It’s protected and openly discussed like a sport.
No sex talk till a lot of time has passed and you are in love.
No means yes, you can not stall sex it forever.
The man the power, but only in the initial stages.
Less adventurous, unless the woman loves her man too much."
"Sex in a love marriage
Orgasms are the best.
Both of you can know whenever you are horny.
Should do it secretly due to Indian society and its norms.
Protection is compulsory.
Sex in an arranged marriage
It's fun and also becomes a responsibility as you are the only options to satisfy each other's physical needs.
Orgasms, cuddling, late night talks, discussion about future etc etc
If not satisfactory, may lead to disturbance in relationships.
No such secrecy.
Protection is not compulsory."
"Nothing as such.
Sex has nothing to do with love or arrange marriage. Its all about sexual drives and how to keep sex alive.
Whether you've had an arranged marriage or love marriage, it doesn't matter. An arranged marriage couple can have an intense sexual relationship and in a love marriage, the sexual life may be dull. Or it can be the opposite. It doesn't matter at all. Whether it was arranged or love, as long as you and your partner are good in bed, it's the same."
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