Sometimes breakups are hard and feel like the end of the world. But if you’re sure about it and so is he, it’s better to part ways. Not all breakups end on a good note. They say it must hurt for it to heal. If thinking about him doesn’t give you teary eyes or a heartburn, you’ve successfully moved on. Most adhere to a ‘no contact’ or ‘block and report’ policy. But if you’re someone who wishes to befriend your ex after the breakup, you might want to follow some precautions for it to work. So, read on!
1. Take Your Time To Move On
Establishing a friendship with your ex too soon after your breakup is a bad idea. No matter how much you pity him or how hard is it to detach, you must mourn the death of your relationship separately. The friendship between you two wouldn’t work unless the feelings have completely vanished.
2. Do Not Hang Out Alone Together
You’ve both been in a relationship before and it is safe to say that you’ve shared a certain level of intimacy with each other. Do not hang out with your ex alone. Never be caught in a situation when you’re too close to him and get cosy. Limit your hangouts to group activities.
3. Carpe Diem
Bury the past and live in the moment. You mustn’t dig up old graves and reason out what went wrong and why. Neither should you reminisce the good moments you had with him. Refrain from talking about what’s over. Make new memories as friends and avoid going down the memory lane. Let bygones be bygones.
4. Don’t Talk Dirty To Him
There is no such thing as healthy flirting between exes. Avoid cracking double meaning jokes or passing kinky comments. Make sure you don’t drop any hints that invite uncalled for drama. Be platonic and have friendly conversations with him that don’t take unexpected turns.
5. Don’t Judge His Choices
Whether or not you like his current girlfriend or girl-friends, keep it to yourself. Don’t judge his choices or pass comments about his preferences. What he does with his life neither concerns you nor calls for your opinion. Let him be and keep your nose out of his new relationships.
6. No Drunk Dialling
We all know what comes after a night of heavy drinking and drunk dialling your ex: a hangover and regret. Alcohol makes you emotional and sentimental. No matter how big the urge is to give him a ring, refrain from doing so. He doesn’t need your attention at 2 am when you’re not sober.
7. Stay Away From His Social Media
The power of social media is such that it gives you all the details whether necessary or not with the touch of one finger. But you must stay away from stalking your exes on his various social media and not obsess over what they’re up to and with whom. Make sure to not keep tabs on their posts or pay much heed to them. Live and let live!
8. Don’t Let Him Be Your Shoulder
We all know how hard is it to lose your emotional support and not have someone taking care of you all the time. But your ex is the last person you need to lend a shoulder to cry on. Set clear emotional boundaries and make sure you don’t fall prey to his nice guy act. Remember, you broke up for a reason.
9. Date New Dudes
The best way to divert your mind is to divert your attention. Go out and meet new boys. Fill the void but don’t necessarily rush into committing to someone new. But keep all your avenues open. Meet new people, and engage with them. You’re a free bird, fly!
10. Don’t Be Too Available
He’s not your boyfriend anymore. He doesn’t need to be your utmost priority. So, treat him like yet another friend and don’t go out of the way for him. He’s had that privilege earlier and as friends, you mustn’t make him feel too special. Talk to him seldom and don’t spam him with details about your whereabouts or your evening plans.
11. You Don’t Need His Opinion Anymore
What should you wear for a girls’ night out or whom should you date, his opinion is not needed at all. You have plenty of friends who can play your experts at giving you pieces of advice. Do not let him in, to an extent that he starts governing your life choices yet again. Avoid sharing too much with him.
12. Feel Free To Put An End To The Friendship
Is spending time with him as friends hard for you because you haven’t fallen out of love with him and fear a relapse? No one’s pushing or forcing you to befriend him post the breakup, so feel free to unfriend him. If being friends with him is hard for you, then call it quits.
GIFs: Giphy
