You know I had once heard this saying: "try again if you don't succeed at once". But honestly, after a few personal experiences, I've come to a conclusion that not every saying is fit for every situation. So, here's a little sneak peek - I had decided to go back to my ex-boyfriend. And why that was a decision I regret is something you'll understand once you hear me out.
I had dated this guy for almost a year. The relationship had its ups and downs and for the longest time but I was feeling unfulfilled with him. He hadn't made me or the relationship a priority. That should have been my first cue but we all know that the heart wants what it wants. I kept dragging that relationship to a point where my patience was constantly tested and that's when I knew I had to end things. For the next two years after the breakup, I didn't date anyone and had the best time being single.
It was all fun and games until my ex-boyfriend decided to come back into my life. It started with one drunk dial. I didn't give in to his advances that night as I clearly remembered how flaky he had been throughout our relationship, but I was touched by the gesture, I wouldn't lie.
As it turned out, that one call was not just a drunken mistake. He called me the next day to tell me that he'd meant it all. He had realised that I was the only girl who gets along with him. He said something that would've affected every girl which is the fact that no one could be a friend to him more than me. I wanted to play a little hard to get because I wanted a sound reason to get back with him. I wanted to make sure that he is sure of what he wants. And this time more for myself than for him!
After a month of acting all tough, I gave in to his advances and finally expressed how I felt about him. I told him to still consider it the one last time before we take an official plunge and he said that he was surer than ever before and his actions from the past one month were a proof of that. So, I thought that if someone was so persistent for a month, he probably had thought it through.
But he really hadn't. It looked like he had been waiting for an ego boost from me. Just to see me let my guards down again. And as soon as I did, he started behaving in the same flaky way like he did before and I realised that a changed man was a big myth. Reconciling with an ex is really going to take you back to where you started. Even if you think it is a fresh start, you can't possibly change that person. It's like reading a book when you already know the ending. But, at the time I was too blind to probably see it as I do now. No matter what you do, you can't really change something that once took a part of you. But lessons learnt!
As for me, I am back to where I started but I guess I am wiser now. Wiser to know that no one really changes no matter how hard you try. Maybe they're good people in general but they're really not meant to be in your life. So, I was okay before it all happened and I'm good after it ended too. It did take me some time but my momma definitely raise a weakling!