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Scandalous AF ‘Naked’ Jeans That Will Make Aunties Go ‘Haye Rabba!’

Scandalous AF ‘Naked’ Jeans That Will Make Aunties Go ‘Haye Rabba!’

It looks like anything can be labelled ‘designer’ or ‘high fashion’ nowadays if you just rip a garment to shreds or tear it apart. “There, that’s a statement”, they say. Don’t get me wrong, I love my ripped boyfriend jeans as much the next denim lover but I do like my jeans with a decent amount of actual denim on them! What is all the world’s obsession with everything *naked*, anyway? From actual nudes to naked dresses and now… *naked* jeans. Warning: Keep out of reach of aunties.

thibaut thong jeans front scandalous naked jeans

thibaut thong jeans back scandalous naked jeans

What you’re looking at, even though there’s practically NOTHING to look at, are extreme cutout designer jeans at Thibaut’s Spring ‘18  show at Tokyo. I know. It’s confusing. These naked jeans or ‘thong jeans’ (named so for obvious reasons) are basically shreds of denim hanging off the model’s waist. You can’t even pass them off as art… forget functional, wearable pants! Back in 2016, Chanel did ‘butt cleavage’ pants and Loewe did clear jeans for its AW show –

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loewe naked jeans aw 16 scandalous naked jeans

While Loewe’s clear pair and Chanel’s one-off butt-show pants can be appreciated as ‘art’ or ‘concept’ jeans, these naked jeans below by US-based brand Carmar Denim do, in fact, not.

Carmar Denim thong jeans scandalous naked jeans

An obvious copy of the Thibaut ‘thong’ jeans, these ‘extreme cut-out jeans’ (understatement of the year) costs $168, i.e., INR 11,340. Why would anyone pay that much given the lack of fabric or design TBH?!. Also, someone wore these thong jeans in public.

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carmar denim instagram scandalous naked jeans

A different but worse looking pair of naked jeans here’s presenting the lace-up denim disaster by Fashion Nova (the brand loved by the Kardashian’s). Brace for impact:

fashion nova naked jeans

Ready to be dumbfounded? Both of these exceptionally purpose-less pairs were sold out almost immediately after they went up online. Wait, there’s more! It pains me to type this, but ASOS, one of the best online brands ever, crossed over to the dark denim side and stocked these ‘crotchless’ jeans too. A moment of silence, please.

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asos crotchless naked jeans

All I want to say to this is ‘R.I.P.’ to those beautiful cuts of denim that were lost during the making of these too-ridiculous-to-explain jeans.

What drives designers to these absurd fashion concepts? Maybe it’s the summer heat that went to their heads. Or they thought naked jeans were an unbeatable option to stay cool.

Either way, there is so much statement denim to choose from, why ruin it? Mom jeans, ripped jeans, deconstructed jeans. Denim is a classic and for it to stay that way, it NEEDS to be there. And let’s face it, naked jeans hardly have any denim on ‘em. It’s enough that our knee-rip jeans get a good number of ‘Beta, you’re a working woman now. Phati hui jeans kyu peheni hain phir?’. No thanks, I’ll spare myself the scandalous stares and stick to my pearl embellished jeans instead. How about you?

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15 May 2018

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