Sitting in the comfortable silence of a quaint little cafe with a friend, sipping on my Chamomile tea, a strange realisation dawned on me. I’d known this person for so long and so well that we did not find it necessary to fill every silence with words. And that’s when I realized – boring relationships may just be the best.
Coming to this conclusion wasn’t so hard. Thinking back on all my relationships, romantic or otherwise, I know one thing for sure – the calm that comes after the initial honeymoon phase is where the real love lies. It’s easy to get swept up in the excitement of new love and friendship where you’re all over the place and all that matters is the thrill of the moment. But, love comes to you in the quiet moments, not in the noise.
We, humans, are creatures of comfort. And that’s what we want in our interpersonal relationships as well. Think about it! In the initial phase of getting to know someone, you’re apprehensive about everything – from what you say to how you behave. You want the other person to think highly of you and you really don’t want to do anything that’ll tarnish their impression of you. But, once all is said and done, you’ll see them at their worst and know that you want them despite their flaws and all.
There is something so comforting about knowing somebody so intimately that you do not find it necessary to communicate with words – it’s like chicken soup on a sick day. That feeling is invariably more valuable than the satisfaction of posting a picture of you two on Instagram after a night of partying. I’m sure you must be thinking how the two are related? Well, let me explain!
We’re a generation of social media obsessed people who need to show the world that, at all times, our life is nothing less than a fairytale. It’s become so important to keep up our appearances that we visit the ‘cool’ places not to have fun but to boast about having visited them online. In all this superficial display of contentment, we’ve forgotten where the real happiness lies – at home in the arms of a loved one. While I love dancing in pubs, a little tipsy with gyrating bodies all around me, there is something so extremely satisfying about the thought of sitting at home with a cup of coffee, watching reruns of Modern Family with my partner.
And in all honesty, these quiet ones are the very moments that make the best memories. Sitting under covers and talking about your hopes and dreams, random bouts of laughter and giggling, looking at them from across the room at a dinner and finding the person staring right back at you. These are the moments that’ll be cherished and valued more than getting drunk on expensive alcohol to dance all night to music you don’t even like.
Maybe comfortable relationships are the best thing to happen to any of us. Maybe, just maybe, boring isn’t the worst thing ever!
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