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WhatsApp has a new ‘Delete’ Feature For All Your Stupid Texts You Regret Sending

WhatsApp has a new ‘Delete’ Feature For All Your Stupid Texts You Regret Sending

You know it’s a Sunday when WhatsApp lets you delete all the stupid texts you send in a hurry because we’re oafs who lack patience and any kind of common sense whatsoever.

We’ve all been at the sending end of the text messages that, we later on realise, were a total mistake – just like that ex-fling who should never have happened in the first place! Thankfully now, WhatsApp has agreed to give us all of 7 minutes to rethink our past actions and reconsider the really, really silly messages we send out; most probably to all the men screwing with our heads and our text to type speed ratio… Don’t even get me started!

Image 1 WhatsApp delete feature

How it works?

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You send a message to someone. Then, you immediately wallow in immense regret and utter stupidity and start panicking about the text you just sent. Inwardly, you want to go and bury yourself in a hole that won’t be dug up for the next 10 years or so, failing which, the apocalypse will end things, anyway. Then, WhatsApp steps in like the Fairy Godmother you only ever read about in a fairytale titled, Cinderella. And waves its wand off magic, enlightening you with its ‘Delete’ feature. So, you tap on the message you want to delete, highlight it; then, go to the little dustbin icon on the upper right hand side of your WhatsApp screen, tap on that. At once, a pop up appears on your screen, asking you, ‘Do you want to delete this message?’ To which your response is, ‘Of course I want to delete this message and every other message I ever sent this person, ever. Period!’ So, you click on ‘Yes.’ And, just like that, the message is gone! POOF! Like magic!

The feature lets you do this for group as well as individual chats – Delete For Everyone, or Delete For Me. You choose whichever applies to you best.

But, just like in the fairytale, there are two tiny problems: First of all, you have exactly until 7 minutes are up to delete this message without the receiver ever even knowing that such a travesty of a message even existed in their inbox. Once you cross the 7-minute mark, really, it’s all in the hands of God, or the devil; depending on which side you’ve made a deal with.

Second of all, if you send the text, the receiver reads it and you realise that you should never have sent that text in the first place – all this, within the 7-minute mark, even – you deleting the message will make no amends, whatsoever because the receiver has already read and witnessed your mistake! No take-backs this time, sorry. 

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WhatsApp is clever like that; not to mention absolutely sadistic. But, hey, they’re giving you 7 minutes to save your soul, or before your text is received and read – whichever happens sooner. Best of luck!      

29 Oct 2017

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