On a typical Saturday night, me and my fairly recent boyfriend (although we prefer the word partner) decided we didn’t want to spend money on an extravagant dinner date and we definitely did not want to be part of a thumping party in town. There is something so sacred about Saturday nights once you start working, right? You’d prefer it to be more on the “calm, getting a spa” kind of lines than the “getting drunk, waking up with a hangover” kinds. Because you always know that Monday is right around the corner. So we ended up with two pizza boxes on the table, watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S on Comedy Central. Being a relationship writer, I was happy to point out to him that Ross & Rachel had been frating for quite a while before they started dating. To which I received a blank look followed by “Are you making up words now?”
And that is what brings me to this. Happy about the fact that he had no clue about the popular relationship terminology, I got my boyfriend to guess 13 relationship terms and here’s the outcome!
What he guessed: Oh, it’s like when you meet someone for the first time and there is this explosion in your mind and you’re like I want to be with this person! She is the lovebomb of my life!
What it actually means: When one partner showers the other with love and affection and later uses the other partner’s feelings to manipulate and control them.
What he guessed: It’s when you checkmate someone, right?
What it actually means: Where two people are chatting + sexting = chexing!
What he guessed: When you are a ghost so you sort of disappear on someone!
What it actually means: Ending a relationship by suddenly disappearing from your partner’s life without any explanation. He got pretty close to that one, right?
What he guessed: When there is a very small, minor problem in a relationship so there is just a blip but you get over it.
What it actually means: A very short relationship entered into just for the heck of it spanning somewhere between one day to three months.
What he guessed: Is it like friends dating?
What it actually means: Frating is when two people become friends with the intention of dating in the future. (I think I gave this one away with the F.R.I.E.N.D.S example!)
What he guessed: Not being very responsive in bed. Like just laying there when the other person does all the work!
What it actually means: When a person ghosts you but then returns back to your life liking your posts on social media and sending compliments, like a zombie returning back from the dead!
What he guessed: Dating your hand, obviously!
What it actually means: When you are happy dating yourself. Treating yourself to good food and music and don’t really need anyone else.
What he guessed: Oh this is definitely kinky! Being strapped in bed by cuffs, you know! I like this one!
What it actually means: When a boyfriend is jealous of his girlfriend hanging out with male friends and so he forbids her from chilling with the opposite sex.
What he guessed: Fight and F*ck? That’s gotta be hot!
What it actually means: Flirt and Forget!
What he guessed: When you are trying to find a girlfriend so you are just fishing around in the pool because there are tons of fishes, you know!
What it actually means: When a person puts up a pretty profile picture just to get attention but it looks nothing like them, they are known to be catfishing!
What he guessed: Waking up your partner with a cupcake, of course!
What it actually means: Talking extra sweet to someone because you like them!
What he guessed: Fancy Bars in Offices? Where people can meet each other?
What it actually means: Facebook Official! (though I like the fancy bars in offices idea better!)
13. Hot room
What he guessed: Is it something like hot boxing? Like you get horny because there are other couples in the room doing stuff when you are not?
What it actually means: A weird social situation like if you were to find yourself in the same place with your current and ex-boyfriend!
I am happy to report that my Saturday was well spent!