Heartbreaks. They make even a mundane thing like breathing seem harder. And your first heartbreak is just a horrible place to be because you have no idea how to recover from it. You are crying yourself to sleep, binge eating and locking yourself in your room because the emotional pain just keeps weighing in on you, day in and out.
My first serious relationship was with my good friend Ansh. We were the same age and he asked me out when I was 16. It was such a smooth transition and before I knew it I was madly in love with this goofy guy who was notorious in school and famous for all the wrong reasons. We shared a great love for books and the popular tv series F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
Even though we were in different colleges, pursuing different courses we used to meet often and always made time for each other. Many girls would swoon over him and that used to make me so jealous. I was a possessive girlfriend but I was also too trusting of him. I had also become very dependent on him. We knew everything about each other and I was even sure about marrying him one day.
Soon I had to move away because my family was shifting to a different city and that’s when the problems started. As 18-year olds, we were not at all aware about the logistics of a long-distance relationship. We started fighting, we couldn’t give time to each other and I found him growing distant not answering my calls, lying and so on. All of it started affecting our relationship.
There came a point where we had serious fights with me crying my eyes out in the public. We both could see that this wasn’t working out and our 3-year-old relationship was dying in front of us. We decided to call it off rather than dragging it and we went our separate ways. Initially, he tried to contact me but I blocked him. We had loads of mutual friends and thanks to social media we just couldn’t just block each other out of our lives. After few years we got back in touch but nobody ever said anything about getting back. We tried to be friends, we met three four times but then again down the line we lost touch.
Sometimes I wonder that how did we go from being one soul to two strangers! But we both have moved on in our lives and I am at a better place today. I know he is doing fine as well and is happy in his life. I would always wish the best for him. Our relationship was not meant to be and I am at peace with that now.
*Names changed to protect privacy
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