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#MyStory: My Dad Is The Biggest Hurdle Between Me & My Dreams

#MyStory: My Dad Is The Biggest Hurdle Between Me & My Dreams

I am from a conservative Rajput family where people still think that girls are supposed to get married by the age of 25 and are just meant to cook and give birth to children. Marriages for Rajputs inevitably implies giving and taking as much dowry as possible. I am totally against dowry, but my father believed without dowry a girl can't get married. I always wanted to study and be independent so that no one can ask for dowry from my father during my marriage.


Since childhood, I saw my mother following what my dad told her to, and she blindfolded-ly did, whether it was right or wrong. I was not at all happy with the way my father used to take each and every decision of our lives. I wanted to be independent, so I could take my decisions, but how can my father digest this.


I completed my graduation from my hometown, and I wanted to do my MBA from Mumbai. My sisters and I are still not allowed to go out (within our city) anywhere. If we want to go out, we are supposed to take our brother and he is there with us till we complete our work. After crying and requesting my father, he sent me to Mumbai to pursue my MBA. It took 2-3 months to convince him.


During the two years of my MBA, I worked really hard so that I can get a good job in a good company and I can convince my father to let me work. I got the job and that too in one of my dream companies. When I got this news, I had no one to share this news with. My friends who got selected with me were calling their parents and giving this awesome news to them, but I couldn't do this as my father will not be happy after hearing this.


Internal - my father will not allow me to work


I just shared the news with my friends who were very happy to hear the news. Now the next question was how will I tell my father that I want to work?


Only 15 days were left for my joining date, so I took courage to tell my father that I don't want to get married now, as I am only 24. When I told him, he started shouting and yelling, ‘Do whatever you want to do, don't ask me or I will leave the house and go.’


I wanted to talk to my father and tell him I don't want to hurt him or his feelings, I just want to be independent so that after marriage I will have equal rights as my husband.


I don't know what to do as I am very unhappy with my life. Should I run away from my house?


I don’t know why my father will not allow me to work. I have left everything on GOD; I know he will do whatever is best for me. I wanted this story to be read by everyone who thinks it’s okay to not let women work.


Images: Shutterstock


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Published on Jul 27, 2017
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