Good ol’ Bollywood loves all things romantic and gets a bit carried away with its imagination sometimes, especially when it gets to play with honeymooners in exotic locations. But, that ain’t reality, so before you get carried away watching them good looking couples romance on the screen, read on to know 10 ways Bollywood got honeymoon all wrong.
1. Women DON’T wear short, short dresses in icy, cold places!
‘Coz it’s freezing cold and that little cap, shawl or the husbands’ arms just don’t suffice.
2. Unlike what Bollywood would have us believe, most couples fight on their honeymoon. Surprise! Surprise!
Honeymoon is about countless kisses, long hugs and tight cuddles, yes. But couples also have their fair share of fights when honeymooning. They might go on to have the best sex of the trip after the fight, but the point is most couples fight on their honeymoon.
3. No couple ever sings or dances on the streets. Ever.
For, people would turn around and think you’re plain mad, not just mad in love.
4. Couples spend more time inside their hotel room than out on their honeymoon. Yes. Not because they are having sex, but ‘coz they are busy sleeping!
Hah! Look how Bollywood fooled you with those closed doors. After those endless nights of rituals and merry-making, most couples catch up on their sleep on their honeymoon. Quite a revelation, no?
5. Seriously, who buys and wears colour coordinated outfits on their honeymoon?
Who even thought that up, huh?
6. All those scenes where husbands and wives walk out of fancy showrooms with bags and bags of all things nice? Yeah, doesn’t happen ‘coz in real life, people are on a budget.
Plus, didn’t they just shop for everything when they got married?
7. No one ever runs around in sarson ke khet, beaches or trees…
Because it’s uncomfortable, damn it. Plus there are prickly, dirty things hiding in that tall grass and in the sinking sand.
8. Finding good food is a major issue, all the time. But no one in the movies seems to have a problem with it.
Here we carry at least one trunk packed with bhujia, mathri, laddoo and several packets of ready-to-cook and still miss ghar ka khana and keep asking them chefs to add a little more masala.
9. Sex in the bathroom is NOT fun!
And yet, it seems to be Bollywood’s favourite idea of steamy, passionate sex with fingers clawing against wet mirrors. Anyone who’s tried it knows that it’s slippery and can cause um, injuries. Not a good idea to fill up our heads with that, dear Bollywood.
10. Spontaneous plans to drink it up, and ride away, don’t really happen ‘coz in real life, the family back home plans the honeymoon and the obedient couple follows the itinerary to the last detail.
Did ya really think the big, Indian fam wouldn’t be a part of the honeymoon? Well, at least now you know better.
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Published on Apr 04, 2017