We know, it isn’t fair to paint people in broad strokes, everyone is different, so on and so forth. But when it comes to the internet, that’s a different beast altogether. Considering how much people tend to live their lives out loud on the world wide web, here are a few types of boys we meet on social media.
1. Selfie Kween
You know the type. He is at the Eiffel Tower. Click. He is in front of his mirror, flexing his muscles. Click. He pets a stray puppy on the road. And within seconds a picture of it makes it to Instagram. This guy's in love with himself, he is clearly his own favourite.
2. Social activist
No matter what is happening in whichever part of the world, he has to put up an essay-esque status on Facebook, citing his opinions loud and clear - he is an expert on everything. Sometimes his posts can be quite controversial, owing to which he has verbal fights with people on his wall, but honestly, he couldn’t care less. He is truly living for that kind of validation.
3. Totalitarian trolls
Yes, everyone is entitled to their opinions, but trolls know just how to take it one notch higher. If you are a woman who knows how to crack a joke, they are ready to pounce - you are not funny, go back to the kitchen. If you are trying to come out of the closet, they’ll bludgeon you with why you are not ‘normal’ and God forbid you are a feminist - what about men’s rights? Because clearly, we haven’t been talking about that over the last gazillion years.
4. PDA aficionados
He has invented a hashtag for himself and his girlfriend - he figured he had to, considering how his timeline is filled with every minutiae of their lives. His relationship status is obviously changed to ‘committed’ and when he is not uploading photos, he is sharing love quotes tagging his girlfriend, who replies immediately and then their mushy chats start transpiring in full public view!
5. The wild child
This guy loves living his life out loud. He is at all the happening parties, he maybe knows a couple of celebs, and he ensures that his pictures are on the social media stat. So on a weekend, if he goes pub crawling with his friends, he’d be shooting, tagging, posting, on the go!
6. Ghost whisperer
He has an on-again-off-again relationship with social media. He is never too active, neither is he passive. He’ll crop up in the middle of nowhere, text you, make plans and vanish yet again. It is best to not keep up your hopes with this kinda guy.
7. Steadfast stalker
He will follow you on Instagram, then find your profile on Facebook and message you about how ‘mesmerizing’ he finds you and how he thinks you both would totally get along. This guy doesn’t understand boundaries and will go a sufficient distance to get your attention.
8. Grammar kill
This guy doesn’t know their from there, your from you’re. You feel bad for him because he is all over the place with his feelings but none of it makes any sense because he can barely construct a single coherent sentence.
9. Fitness junkie
If you have posted a picture of stuffing your face at a McDonald’s, he’ll know just how to make you feel the absolute worst. This guy lives for working out, he counts his calories like his life depends on it and he can’t understand how you are even alive after consuming the amount of junk food that you do every day.
10. The overall good guy
The ones who use social media in moderation and tend to not take it too seriously? Yes, they exist. And more often than not they are quite nice and charming in person as well!
Published on Apr 22, 2017