#MyStory: We Thought We Had His Father’s Blessing But…
We met in the maths tuition, around six years ago. I was in eleventh grade and he was in the first year of his engineering. Gradually, we started talking to each other and became close friends. We started meeting more often, bunking tuitions and chilling with our group of close friends. Something slowly changed between us and we started feeling more emotionally connected than ever. I started to like and think about him more, but I chose to ignore that feeling because we were just friends and I never imagined him to be my boyfriend. Also, I was scared that if he didn’t feel the same way, we would lose our friendship.
But all these insecurities didn’t stay for long. We started talking on the phone all day and night and spending more time alone… That got us even closer. In the meanwhile, I had to leave the city in a few days for my higher studies. His family knew about our friendship and me and they all loved me. We were still friends and I left for Bangalore to study further. That is when I realized that I actually missed him way more than I thought I would.
The moment I started walking away from him I realized that I loved him. After going to Bangalore, our long phone calls continued for about a month or so. He lived in Mangalore, which wasn’t too far. So, I thought the next time I’d meet him, I’d tell him my feelings. But I guess I couldn’t wait and I confessed my feelings to him on a random phone call and he said that he loved me too and how he wanted to be with me all this while!
He was an amazing boyfriend! We fought a lot but that only made us stronger. I finally met him after seven months, when I got a chance to go to Mangalore and both of us were super excited. I was there for a week and had the best time of my life.
Our relationship continued to grow with time and after two years of our relationship, since he was extremely close to his dad he decided to tell him about us. His dad didn’t agree to us being together and told him that if he wanted to marry me or continue his relationship with me, he would have to forget his family. He persuaded his father and told him he couldn’t live without me or them, and somehow, they agreed. I felt blessed to find such a great person. It was indeed the best day ever.
But, all this happiness didn’t last long. After a month, my mom came to Bangalore and asked me to stop talking to Vivek. Since I and my mom were extremely close to each other I told her that I loved Vivek and couldn’t stop talking to him. That was when she told that Vivek’s dad had called her and told her about our relationship. He told my mom that ‘Your daughter is crossing her limits and disturbing my son.’ Those were his exact words. It broke my heart. I told my mom about how much I loved him and that he loved me too.
She told me that his parents would never agree and I would eventually have to let go of this relationship. She also told me that she didn’t want to go against Vivek’s parents’ wishes. I even called his parents and requested them to hear me out and accept me, but they refused to.
That’s when I finally I decided to break up with him. Not because my love had faded but because I felt that his parents were the most important people in his life. I knew the kind of bond he shared with his parents. I didn’t want to be the reason for so much bitterness. I lied to him that my mom read our conversations and she didn’t want us to be in a relationship so there was no way for us to be together.
I know it broke his heart but I had to let him go and I couldn’t find a better way for him to be happy with his parents. He tried a lot to convince me otherwise. But in the end, I knew it couldn’t happen. He left me a message saying, ‘You know how much I love you. But if that love causes a disturbance in your family, I am happy to leave you for your family. But just keep in mind that I will ALWAYS love you… FOREVER.’
I left the country within six months of all this happening and it’s been about three years since this happened. I still love him more than he could ever imagine and when I see his photographs, I still wish I could be a part of his life and his family someday.
*Names changed to protect privacy.
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Published on Apr 10, 2017