#MyStory: My Bestie And I Fell In Love… With The Same Guy!
I went to an all girls’ boarding school where our interaction with the opposite sex was quite limited. In fact, when boys from the nearby school would send us letters or compliment any of us, we really didn’t know how to respond. And given these circumstances, it wasn’t uncommon when any of those guys from the nearby school fell for the same girl and sometimes, it also happened that two girls fell for the same guy from that school. I thought that this would end once we pass out of school.
As luck would have it, I got admission in an all girls’ college too! While we were discovering the joy of being free and having no restrictions, we were also getting familiar with members of the opposite sex. Since the easiest way to meet them was through friends itself, there were a few of them whom we would hang out with over the weekends.
This is when I met Sameer. He was a cousin of Pratibha’s, who was one of my closest friends. It felt quite comfortable and was fun hanging out with him. All of us friends - Sameer, Pratibha, Nalini (my best friend) and I - would go out for dinners, movies and parties.
Sameer and I were becoming closer and I had developed a major crush on him. I hadn’t told any of my friends because I wasn’t sure if it was anything more than just a crush. My attraction towards him was increasing every day. I would blush when he was around, and would look forward to spending time with him every time we met. We had also met alone once or twice and it felt like we were making a connection. I felt that he was interested in me too, and I was actually waiting for him to make the first move.
One day, Nalini and I went out dancing and she turned around and told me that she thinks Sameer is cute and that he felt the same way about her. I was shattered because all this while I had been thinking that he liked me. It felt very strange to hear her say all these things. She was showing me messages that he had sent her and telling me how she felt about that. In the middle of all of this, she asked me, ‘I hope you don’t like him.’ I just shrugged it off saying, ‘Of course, not!’
Since school, this was the first time I had felt that way about someone. This situation was very difficult. I didn’t know what to do next. I started stepping back and stopped my one-on-one interaction with Sameer, so that I don’t get hurt. I also didn’t want to ruin my friendship with Nalini and Pratibha. But the truth is, it was really tough for me to get out of this phase.
Sameer asked me multiple times what had happened. He would keep asking me why I was behaving so strangely. I would just say, ‘Nothing’, every time. All this while, Nalini would tell me about how things were going between them. Some of it would seem very over the top, but I never questioned it.
One time when we were out, Nalini snapped at me and I got really mad. Sameer noticed this and asked me multiple times what had happened. I blurted it all out.
He just stared at me and seemed a little taken aback. He clarified saying there is absolutely nothing going on between him and Nalini. In fact, he was chatting and messaging her so that he would get to know me better, because he liked me and was unsure how I felt about him. I was just standing there, perplexed about what I should say.
All I could do at that point was hug him and tell him that I felt something for him too. Meanwhile, I had to have the tough chat with Nalini too. But I did it very gently and made her understand that my intention was never to hurt her.
It did strain our relationship a bit for some time, but after 6 years of Sameer and I being together, Nalini has also found her one true love and those college times are blurry now.
But I am glad I decided to back off when I realized that my best friend fell for the same man because it only brought him and me closer while not upsetting her and breaking her heart. I also understood that it must have been hard for her at first, so I made sure that I was there for her in whichever way possible to make this a tad bit easy.
*Names changed to protect privacy
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Published on Jan 30, 2017