Sex is awesome, and sex with someone you care about and are in a relationship with can be even more so. So here are a few things to keep in mind when when you’re getting down and dirty with bae...a few sex mistakes to avoid!
1. Don’t skip the foreplay…
Don’t, ladies, just don’t. Foreplay is a time of fun and flirtation and anticipation - even though you guys are familiar with each other’s bodies and can probably turn up the heat in an instant, let it build. It’s great, we swear!
2. Love it? Then tell him you do!
Don’t keep him guessing whether you’re enjoying what you do together or not. For knowing that you’re as turned on as he is and deriving pleasure from the things he does to your body will not only make him feel happy but will also be great for you - after all, you want him to do more of the stuff that you love, right?
3. Hate it? Don’t blurt it out loud in the middle, but convey it for sure.
Is there a thing that he always does that you don’t actually like too much? Girl, let him know gently...tell him that you want to try something a little different, or even that same thing slightly differently. Better communication = better sex!
4. Don’t let insecurity overwhelm you.
We all have our little flaws - some of which are noticeable only to us! Don’t let feelings of awkwardness or insecurity get in the way of your pleasure together. Know that your boy is in bed with you because he wants to be there.
5. Don’t take him for granted!
You know this happens sometimes - you become so used to each other (and so caught up in your own pleasure) that you forget to say nice things, forget to tease, forget to show appreciation… But don’t forget, ladies! All these little things help keep the spark alive longer and keep it burning brighter.
6. And don’t let him take you for granted!
It’s a two-way street, after all. Remind him if he seems to forget that you’re as much in the moment as him, and that you too appreciate those little gestures that add up to so much!
7. Getting a bit TOO comfortable…
Yes, you know what his fav position is, and he knows what your turn-ons are, and you follow the exact same routine every time you get into bed together… Take a break from those ‘regular’ things and do something different every now and then to avoid getting into a rut when it comes to your bedroom games. Whether it’s taking things out of the bedroom sometimes or whether it’s a brand-new toy you want to experiment with, mix things up for sure! Variety is the spice of life, after all.
8. Don’t forget to take necessary precautions!
Yeah, you’re in a committed relationship, but that doesn’t mean you can afford to do away with the condoms unless you’re on the pill. You don’t want unnecessary complications, right? And even if you’re using an oral contraceptive, it’s a good idea for both you and your boy to get yourself tested for STDs before you decide to do away with condoms - after all, knowing that you’re both safe and fine and have nothing to worry about is as important as being happy in bed together!
9. Please don’t fight in the middle of it!
Upset about something he did? Resolve it before you get naked with each other. And when you’re in bed, keep negativity at bay and address problems afterwards. Sex should be about building intimacy, not confrontations!
10. Don’t expect him to always want it…
Ladies, not every guy is horny all the time - contrary to what all those magazines would have you believe. Just like you sometimes feel super-ready for it and other times could not be bothered, he too has different states of mind when it comes to sex. You’re ready but he isn’t? Cuddle up in comfort and relax...your relationship is about way more than just sex, right?
11. Don’t let other stuff get in the way!
Had a horrible day at work? Feeling angry with your bestie? Try and compartmentalize and leave those emotions outside the bedroom door. Talk to him, tell him where you’re at, and then take things forward if you feel like it. For all you know, a good, hot round of action might just be what you need to lift your mood up!
12. Don’t wait for him to initiate it every time.
Too many of us tend to forget sometimes that we have as much right to start things off as our boyfriends do - and that sometimes our boys enjoy knowing that we want them without having to prompt us. So take charge and tell him what naughty things you have in mind and turn the heat on a bit!
13. Don’t forget that it’s not ALL in the mind, but a lot of it is!
Sex is an act of great intimacy between two people, especially two people who are in a relationship with each other. And intimacy is a state of mind that flourishes with affection and pleasure derived not just from each other’s bodies but also each other’s company. Work at keeping your relationship amazing, and your bedroom too will be a happy place!Images: Shutterstock, Tumblr