Whatever happened to the words of wisdom you once gave me when we initially started dating? I think it was something along the lines of, ‘good looks fade, but a good heart keeps you beautiful forever’. As cheesy as that sounded, it was those very words that stole my heart. Unfortunately, today tells a different tale...
I don’t really know what went wrong between us, but somewhere along the way, you stopped looking at me the way you used to. Your suddenly snarky comments started to tick me off and make me feel less attractive in your eyes by the day. Maybe you got too comfortable in this relationship, or you simply, fell out of love with me...
Whatever was your reason, I want you to know that it took me years to accept the way I looked. I only cut myself some slack when I realized that I’m not alone in this soup, it’s a phase most women face at some point in their lives. In the process of trying to fit in the social bracket of having the ‘perfect bod’, we’ve sacrificed our happiness and sold our confidence.
It's sad but also true that not many of us have completely come to terms with our bodies. I guess it’s due to years of conditioning that’s got us into believing that the ‘ideal’ body is meant to be lean and slim. (Dear magazines and TV soaps, pat yourselves on the back!)
My point is, I didn’t expect you of all people to give me grief. Isn’t being supportive, loving and caring, part of the ‘boyfriend package’? Moving on... I want you to know that the very fact that I can breathe, stretch and wake up every morning is a blessing by itself.
I won’t lose weight just because it pleases your tiny thought box. In fact, I heard that only insecure people make fun of other people? (Isn’t that ironic?)
Sure we did make some good memories, but after all that’s said and done, it’s time for me to say goodbye. More than I respect my self-worth, I respect my body. I also deserve the kind of person who appreciates my soul and looks beyond my physical appearance. I have a strong feeling this guy is out there somewhere, it’s only a matter of time and circumstance that we cross paths.
As for you, I’m giving you the opportunity to walk away from this relationship. You’re free to find and settle down with someone who you think meets your ‘standards’. Because I've realized that your love is shallow. It lacks substance and there’s nothing more than meets the eye.
I hope there comes a time when you become a tad bit sensitive towards people’s feelings and accept them for who they are and not for what they look like. I hope you can see the beauty in every tiny things that make a person unique. (Then again, we both know that’s just wishful thinking.)
Till then, I will continue to eat to my heart's content and live my life queen size. Because you know...you live life only once. Might as well make merry and live it up to the fullest - am I right, or am I right?