The process of getting married isn’t easy precisely. Because most Indian weddings tend to be not just about the bride and groom. There are a thousand things to plan, a few dozen relatives to satisfy and another hundred to at least please. Then there are the friends to take care of, the cousin’s nephew’s family to be invited...and so on and so forth. It isn’t just you and him getting married - it’s two families. And for each person who is going to be closely involved in your wedding, there are gifts to plan. The saris for all your maasis and chaachis (and his too). The mehendi or sangeet favours for all the besties and cousins. Hell, even the tokens that go out with your wedding invite. And guess who’s missing out in this list of people to be gifted? Your fiance.
Your family might be building a whole treasure trove of gifts for him as carefully as they’re planning your trousseau, but what are you planning to gift him? (Apart from the pleasure of your presence for life, of course!) For the bride-to-be who’s caught up in all the wedding madness, here’s a little list to help you make your way out of the chaos and show a little love and appreciation to the man who’s soon going to be your husband.
1. The love letter
Yes, a letter. Not an email, and certainly not a text. Take the time to sit down and write down your hopes for your future together. Your feelings about him. Get hold of handmade paper, do a practice run if you need to...just write him a warm letter that you know will make him smile. Seal it in an envelope as beautiful as your wedding invite and send it to him. Or, even better, deliver it by hand!
2. The teasing little gift
This one’s for the bride who’s willing to be a little risque! His morning coffee or cuppa in a mug with that naughty message from his wife-to-be - what better way to make sure that he has you on his mind first thing in the morning? ;-)
Go old-school with this one - well, quite literally. Remember those last few days of school when you went crazy getting people to write in a diary, just so that you could read it years later and relive those memories? Well, get his friends (and yours) together to make him a scrapbook. Whether they’re silly jokes or wishes of happiness, this is a “bachelor days” gift he will always cherish. Make a video if you’d like, but make something for sure!
4. The traditional timepiece
There’s no going wrong with a classic wristwatch. And if you pick the right one, it’s not only a useful gift but one that is elegant too. Go for one that reflects his personality if you think he’d enjoy it, or just stay with the ever-stylish silver number.
Does he like his laptop a little too much? Then maybe a leather bag for it is something that he would love. Find a leather store in your city that takes custom orders and get him a monogrammed one. Or is he the kind who, every once in a while, likes the formal kind of dressiness? Speak to your jeweller about making a pair of cufflinks with his initials engraved. Maybe even think about getting him a laptop decal featuring his fav superhero? You get the drift. He will know and appreciate the time and thought you put into it and treasure your gift. :-)
6. The funny ironic gift!
A couple who laughs together...stays happy! And if you’re the kind of folks who enjoy turning stereotypes on their heads, then this hilarious doormat is perfect for you! But maybe save this one for your bedroom door, and not have it in the living room for guests to be a bit shocked by!
Is there a phone whose latest version he’s been waiting for with bated breath? Is he the guy who secretly wants a full boxed set of Asterix comics? Does thinking about the new Wii make him go misty-eyed? Is an autographed CD of songs by his fav band going to make his day-week-year? Girl, don’t waste any time waiting - just get on the job already!
8. A game for two
“I’ve never played Snakes & Ladders” said no Indian ever! So why not bring back those fun, laughter-filled memories with a quirky “Couple’s Ludo” kinda board game? Gift him this cute little game set, and promise him that someday soon it’s going to be you and him, with just that board in between. :-)
There’s all the planning, there’s the week of functions, there’s that hectic wedding day, and then there are all those newlyweds visits that are pretty much mandatory for any new couple. So where’s the time for just you two? Even if you’re taking a honeymoon break, the moment you hit your city again, you’re going to be inundated with obligations you cannot escape. Now’s the time to plan ahead. Look up his schedule and yours and plan a quick little weekend getaway a month after the wedding. Book the tickets, put them in an envelope with a note explaining why - trust us, he’ll be ever so happy to be able to run away with you! (P.S.: If you can convince the families to let you both go away together even before the wedding, that’s going to be a pretty amazing break - but we’re not sure they’ll let you abandon them during this crucial planning time. :P)
10. The gift of time
Even as you are swept up in the chaos of wedding planning and feel like you haven’t a moment to even breathe, carve out little niches of time that’s for just you and him. Do it quietly, even sneakily if you need to - but just escape everything and everyone and go hang out with him. Buy a cute little notepad and draw out coupons - “Movie time”, “Picnic”, “Coffee?” - and hand it over to him. Tell him to use those coupons whenever he wants. Woo him, let him know that he’s always on your mind. Be a couple, not just a bride-and-groom pair. The wedding will get over, but your relationship is forever...let it grow. <3