How To Make Shaadi Planning With The In-Laws Much Smoother!
TanayaEditorial Coordinator, POPxo
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The wedding preparations are on in full swing and you are on cloud nine - you are marrying the man you love! Now is time for you to build new relationships with your fiancé’s family, and you obviously don’t want to start things off on the wrong foot. Right from the clothes, to the jewellery, to the number of functions, the décor, the food and everything else - you and your soon-to-be family are going to be a part of all the planning. During the planning phase, you are going to be spending a lot of time with his family and there will be some difference of opinions too. And so, we have compiled a few easy ways to get along with your in-laws during your wedding planning!
1. Talk to your fiancé
It is important for you both as a couple to talk about your wedding planning and chalk things out. You both need to be on the same page before discussing anything with your respective families. Once this is done, sit down as a couple with your families and tell them what you both have in mind and ask them for their opinions and ideas.
2. Listen and learn
Be open to hearing your in-laws out and find out what they have in mind for the wedding. Ask them about what all is important for them, and what they’d want to have done for their son’s wedding.
3. Build your own relationship with them
Yes, they are your fiancé’s parents, but soon they will be yours too. Just like you would want your fiancé to bond with your parents, this time gives you an opportunity to bond with his people. Use this phase to build a personal relationship with them, instead of treating them just as “his parents”.
4. Be welcoming
Respect your in-laws and reach out to them. Keep in mind that you are building a foundation for a lifelong relationship. The wedding functions will be over in a few days, but your relationship with them is for a lifetime.
There will be occasions wherein you’ll completely disagree with them but just like you won’t want your fiancé, to raise his voice or argue with your parents, he also would expect the same of you. Accept the fact that everyone has their own taste and preferences, and instead of creating an issue and fighting over situations, be sensitive to their ideas and preferences, and work a way out.
6. Respond in a respectful manner
It is okay and normal if you do not like any idea suggested by them. But don’t blatantly rubbish their idea. Respond to them by saying, “Interesting idea, I will surely think about it.” We all want to be heard out, right?
7. Attend bridal exhibits together
There are various bridal shows and exhibitions that keep taking place. Involve your mother-in-law in your shopping, and take her along with you when you go for these exhibitions. This way, you both will have an idea of what is available in the market, and this will help both of you understand each other’s taste in wedding-wear, and clothes in general. An added bonus - shopping is always a great chance for female bonding, ladies!
8. The number of functions
Your in-laws might want to organize a few functions for you both. Let them plan this for you the way they want to. It is, after all, their son’s wedding! Of course, let them know how you feel about this, and leave it to them to take the final call.
When your would-be mother-in-law wants to buy some outfits for you, be open with her and tell her about your taste and preferences. This is better than you stacking up all the outfits in your cupboard and never using them.
10. Families will have clashes
Wedding planning is not a smooth ride. Both the families will have clashes and issues. This is natural as both sides have their own sets of customs and traditions. You can always tell your parents later about what you feel about things are right or wrong, and if you feel your in-laws are correct, then give credit to their suggestions.
11. Build memories
This phase will never come back! Be one family and travel to the venues together, go for food tasting, shopping and meetings with your vendors. Click pictures together and build lifelong memories for you to always cherish.