In high school, I had a huge crush on Amal. He was the most popular guy in the school. Along with good looks, he had a very charming personality, so I knew that a shy and nerdy girl like me had no chance with him. I was sure that he didn’t even know that I existed.
And as luck would have it, we both got admission in the same college. My feelings for him grew stronger and I started noticing everything about him. The way he played basketball, the way he laughed… I found everything about him attractive.
A few months into college, I started taking tuitions after the regular classes. And guess what, the tuitions would take place in his classroom. One day, I was just going through the books kept under the desk and saw his name on them… I was sitting on his seat! I was both nervous and excited. I flipped through one of the books and saw that he had doodled on some pages. On the last page I just wrote, “Nice art. Picasso would have hired you ;)"
The next day, the same book was lying under the desk with a note that read - "What about you?" And thus we started leaving notes for each other every single day. I couldn't wait for my tuition to start; the thought of what he might have written gave me goosebumps.
I must admit, his sketches were pretty good. One day he drew a guy and a girl with a note at the bottom that said, “I wish I could meet you.” We started having conversations about our dreams, fears and our past through these notes. On his birthday, he left me a lot of chocolates in the desk. You wouldn't believe it but I kept all the wrappers of those chocolates.
While I was happy with the way things were going, the fact was he hadn’t seen me in person. And I had a fear that if he saw me he would not be interested in me.
As much as I wanted it to be a secret, my friends came to know about what was happening between Amal and me. They started teasing me and as the word spread, he came to know that it was me he was sharing those notes with. I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself in it forever when he finally told me that he had "seen me."
Our conversations came to a halt as our exams started. On the last day of our exams, I received a letter with his name written at the bottom. I was beyond happy, my hands were shaking. However, when I read the letter it broke my heart - he actually asked for the contact number of my friend. So many things went through my mind - "Why me? Why couldn’t he ask somebody else? Did he forget all those sweet things we talked about through those notes?”
All of my questions remained unanswered. But still I gave him her number. I didn’t hear from him after that, and frankly speaking, I didn’t have any expectations.
College got over and everyone went their separate ways. Sometimes, I would think of him. It is hard to forget your first crush.
Almost six years later, we bumped into each other in a market. He looked as good as ever; he still had that gorgeous smile. And yes, he remembered me. We had a small catch up chat and I walked away.
That night he sent me a friend request on Facebook, and sent me a message after I accepted it. He said that I had changed a lot and mentioned how good I look now. He even asked me for my number. LOL.
How times change! A few years back, he had no interest in me and now he wanted my number. However, I had moved on and had no feelings for him. In fact, I was in a relationship with another guy, someone who didn’t judge me for my looks. He accepts me the way I am and loves me unconditionally.