I have been a victim of body shaming for years. I have often heard harsh comments and jokes about my body weight and shape since my childhood.Things got worse after I completed high school. The comments from people just got little too much. Although I didn’t react to such comments, they did hurt. And it slowly started affecting my self confidence - I felt like I wasn’t worthy of anything.
One night, I was feeling little low and while talking to my boyfriend I just said, “You should leave me and find another girl who is perfect with no flaws. I am the most imperfect person in this world.”
A little worried, he asked me why I said so and I told him I had many reasons to feel this way. He simply said, “Tell me all those reasons.”
I replied, “I am not beautiful, I don’t have a proper dressing sense, I hardly know how to put on makeup… I don’t have either the perfect features a girl should have or the qualities a girl should possess. I keep hearing negative things about myself from everyone.”
What he said next completely changed me and my life.
He said, “Who says you are not beautiful? You are the most beautiful person I have ever met in my life. Also, I love the way you wear clothes; you have your own unique style and you don’t look like every other girl. And yes, the thing I love the most about you is that you don’t prefer makeup and what we see is your natural look. The fact that you are not the girly girl is the reason we connect so well. And talking about perfect features, they are not that important, you look amazing. You don’t have to listen to what people say. You are a wonderful person and if these people can’t see that, well, it’s their loss.”
His words made me think hard. If somebody else could think so positively about me and my “so-called” flaws, why couldn’t I? I realized that there was no need to show the world that I was capable of doing things in my own way and I definitely do not have to live like they wanted me to.
Many people, especially girls, have been victims of body shaming and have lived a miserable lives thinking the worst of themselves. What we need to remember is everybody is perfect in their own way and nobody has the right to tell you to change yourself to fit into their “idea” of you. What makes a person beautiful is their nature and behaviour, not their body shape or size.
People need to accept others for who they are rather than making fun of them just because they are different.
My boyfriend's words completely changed the way I used to think of myself. To everyone who has gone through torture like me, all I have to say is, “Never change just because somebody thinks you are not perfect for society.”