Our parents raise us to be strong, independent women who can deal with anything life throws our way and be the heroes that our society needs. But they also raise us up reminding us, time and again, how we eventually have to leave them behind to look after and nurture a family of our own. Marriage does bring in many changes in a woman’s life, but some things should stay just the way they are...
1. The way you care for and look after the people who spent their life, bringing you up.
The Bombay High Court recently passed judgement in a case ruling that women were obligated to take care of their parents, even after marriage, if they had the means to do so. And we couldn’t help but rejoice at this gender neutral decision that puts the girl child at par with her male counterpart, eliminating the age-old bias that only a male child can act as a parent’s support in old age.
2. The way you dress up
The saree is not a married woman’s uniform, just like the mangalsutra and sindoor aren’t her accessories. When the way you wish to adorn yourself doesn’t change after marriage, why should the adornments themselves change?
3. The way you decide to spend your time
Why shouldn’t you be able to meet your friends as often as before, or why should you need permission to stay over at your parents for as long as your heart desires? Marriage never spelt shackles - until women were bound within familial duties that asked of them to prioritise everyone else’s needs above their own.
4. The way you consent to sex
It is your body, and only you can decide what you want to do with it, and who you allow near it. Marriage may make sex with your partner legal and legitimate, but it doesn’t rule out the need for your consent in the act. Sex without consent is rape, within marriage and without.
5. The way you put your education to use
Marriage shouldn’t rubbish your education by putting an end to your dreams and by diminishing your ability to give back to society. You're still free to do the job you wanted to before getting married, starting that business you always dreamed of or using your knowledge to shape the lives of people around you.
6. The way you are addressed
Why can’t you be a “Ms” if your husband continues to be a “Mr” after marriage? Who said you can’t keep your father’s name if your husband chooses to do the same? Your marital status does not have to be prefixed or suffixed to your name post marriage.
7. The way you choose to live your life
Marriage doesn’t make you an adult, experience does. Marriage doesn’t bind you within the walls of your home, society does. What marriage does, though, is gift you a life partner, a partner-in-crime in all that you choose to do, leaving you with the choice to do whatever you wish to.
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Published on May 11, 2016