Time flies so fast… I feel like it was just a few days ago that I was planning my wedding but it’s already been a year!
In this one year, my husband and I have been through different situations and emotions… we’ve laughed together, have had fun together, have fought for each other and have argued with each other.
If you ask me, I wouldn’t be able to say whether I love being married or not, but all I can say is that marriage has brought out a whole different side of me and I am enjoying it. It has taught me the nuances of life and human emotions. In this one year of adjusting to a new phase of my life, I have understood my weaknesses and my strengths.
Most of my married friends had told me that the first year of marriage is the “honeymoon period,” but for me it turned out to the most challenging phase. My husband and I have totally different personalities. He is a practical person and I am more emotional. He is someone who is totally committed to routine and I love to live life in the moment without sticking to any routine. He is reserved and I am an outgoing person. He is a cleanliness freak and I am a normal human being ;). He is a healthy eater who prefers veggies and I am a pizza-and-golgappa woman…
Being a realistic man, my husband was mature enough to realise and accept the reality of marriage, but it took me some time to let go of the fantasy picture of marriage I’d had in my mind. The reality of a married life struck me only after a month of our wedding and I did find it challenging to accept the fact that marriage is not just a joyride full of love and care. Rather, I’ve finally figured, it is just an empty box and it depends on you what you will fill it with… My first year of marriage became a rollercoaster ride as I tried to fill this box.
I tried to learn from other people’s experiences and came to understand that life doesn’t have any set rules or methods - everyone has different battles to face and I have to learn to fight mine on my own.
So, gradually, I started accepting that husband and I both have different natures and that trying to change each other is not going to help. I became more considerate of the fact that we both have different priorities in life and what matters is that we support each other to get ahead in life. We both started doing our part to make each other happy, so that we could be a happy couple. He started eating pizza every once a while with me, and I started including more veggies in my meal - trust me, this was one of the toughest adjustments! :D
Though things weren’t absolutely great at the beginning, I now understand why I had felt so strongly that Anuj is the man I should marry. I had met a couple of guys suggested by my family and I’d felt he is better for me than any other man. And I was right, because today even when we have a fight, I know he will still support me when I need him. I know we might have different opinions about things, but he will also respect my opinion. And despite of the lack of similarities in our personalities, I somehow love this man more than I did before.
So here’s to surviving all the tough times and making the most of happy times… I look forward to more years of happiness and challenge with the man I love.
* Names changed to protect privacy.
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Published on Apr 20, 2016