To have an orgasm is the obvious answer. But we do know that women don’t often get why that’s so important for us. Or why us guys like to, uh, indulge ourselves so often. Here’s trying to answer that question for you - 13 reasons!
1. I haven’t done it in a while. I wonder why?
And since we are wondering, the answer (obviously) is to end the dry patch, so to speak.
2. I’m not getting laid. So...
I mean, really. What else can a guy do when he’s not getting any?
3. There’s a possibility I might get laid. On the other hand, it might not happen. Might as well get it out of the system.
Yes, ladies, we are always hopeful when we’re about to meet you… But we accept that there is a very real possibility that things might not go as far as we would like.
4. Okay, I’m definitely going to get laid, but I don’t want things to get over too quickly! Should just do this first and take the edge off.
This one’s as much for you ladies as it is for us. We don’t want to come too soon when we get down to it after all, because a) who wants to things to end in a flash; b) we want to last for you!
5. I got laid, but I’m still excited. Plus, such great images in my head.
Let’s just say that having sex can get us as excited as anticipating sex - it’s all that adrenalin! Besides, we are replaying that tape in our minds right now - might as well put it to good use!
6. Empty house. God knows when I’ll have privacy again…
Absolute privacy is not an opportunity to be wasted!
7. There is NO way that I am going to get to sleep with her. Might as well help myself.
Our favourite movie stars. Ex-girlfriends. Girls we like but who do not like us back. Basically, if the lady in question is unattainable, the least we can do is...comfort ourselves.
8. I can’t sleep. This will help.
It’s definitely more effective than counting sheep! And more fun too.
9. I’m randomly horny.
You’d be surprised at how common this is. It’s not even like something particularly sexual happened to turn us on. And, well, when that happens, it needs to be taken care of!
10. Hmm. I should make sure the pipes are in working order.
Sometimes we just want to make sure that we still got it. And that things are fine down there.
11. I’m hungover. I might feel slightly better after this.
It works, sometimes. Though it does leave us even more tired than before.
12. Oh, new YouPorn video, yay!
Hey. Good porn is good porn. One must appreciate it.