There’s a nip in the air, pretty lights all around and parties galore...what’s not to love about Diwali, right? WRONG! Along with those parties comes socialising, and let’s face it – a lot of it is forced. So if you’re dreading it like we are, worry no more! We’ve drawn up a list of conversation starters that should honestly sort you out. Festive swagger, here we come!!!
1. If I have even one more Mithai I’ll definitely start to look like a laddo!
Mithai humour will never fail you. From a younger cousin to an older aunty, everyone will get this obvious joke - universal and delicious all at once, really.
2. If only Bhagwan Ram would pay my very hefty electricity bill this month, amirite?
This is India and budget humour works with everyone! Bring Diwali lights into the picture and you have people guffawing at your wit.
3. Question: What would you call an actress that literally lights up the screen?
Ans: Diwalia Bhat!
Okay, stop sneering at me. People love puns!
4. Question: Which Bollywood actor doesn’t really need to put up Diwali lights?
Ans: Hrithik, because uska ghar waise hi Roshan hai!
Lighten up, people!
5. We don’t need to burst crackers, Auntyji, because you are already looking like a bomb!
This Diwali, compliment all the aunties in all their finery and get bonus points for being the lovely, cultured young person that you are!
6. Karan Johar would have loved this!
Just another way of saying the place is looking good enough to be part of one of KJo’s movies, which obviously have pretty homes and Indian festivities (and Shahrukh, but we’ll let that go) as a part of their themes.
7. Ok wow! I will not be needing my Instagram filters today.
Pay the host a compliment on how great their place looks!
8. Ever wonder why we gamble during Diwali? How else would we pay for these new clothes, hai naa?
Some good-old harmless, well timed “broke girl” humour for the win!