It is an extremely difficult situation to be in, if your parents don’t like your guy. Your parents are an important part of your life and their opinion and approval obviously matters.
But you’ve also grown close to your boyfriend and want them to like him as much as you do! If they don’t, don’t worry. It is not something that can’t be sorted out. Here are a few things definitely worth trying if your parents do not like your boyfriend.
1. Understand where your parents are coming from
Your parents love you and would only want the best for you. So if they feel like you’re not making the right choice as far as your partner is concerned, try and understand why they feel that way. There is a possibility they have some good points to make. You may be the best judge of who you want to be with, but their input will only help you. On the other hand, they could also be thinking something about your partner that is completely untrue. If you don’t ask them what is bothering them, and give them a patient hearing, you will never be able to clear that up.
2. Don’t retaliate to their criticism with criticism
Don’t get overly defensive and start criticizing their way of thinking and being. Yes, they are older and therefore their ideas will be slightly more fixed too. Explain things to them in a calm manner and clear all their doubts without getting agitated. It can be hard, but try!
3. Don’t be overly secretive about everything related to him
Keeping your relationship with your partner a secret or hiding things about him will only make them more suspicious. It will raise doubts in their mind about something being wrong. Instead, be open about discussing your partner and address their questions about him. They are bound to be curious about who their daughter is choosing to be in a relationship with!
4. Talk him up a little bit
Brag about him a little. Tell them about how great he is as a person, how he is doing so well for himself and his achievements. Just as you value their opinion, they will value yours too. So knowing that you think highly of someone will make them think of them in better light.
5. Make a joint effort with your partner to win them over
Of course he should feel comfortable enough to be himself, but you know your parents best. So if there are certain aspects about him that he needs to tweak just a little bit before he meets them, tell him!
6. Set up a meeting
Introduce him to your parents if things are at a stage where they know everything about the two of you and you are serious about each other. There is no point trying to delay this meeting if it is going to happen eventually anyway. Getting to know him as a person and seeing that you have confidence enough to make him meet them will only raise their level of confidence about him. They will feel more comfortable about you being with him if they know who he is as a person!
7. Give it time
Don’t rush this whole thing. If you try to force your parents into accepting him in a hurry, that might actually set their backs up. We are not saying wait forever, but give it a few months at least. Let them have time to think about him, to understand all the wonderful things about him that you love - if they see that you are both committed to making the relationship work and develop, they will find it easier to accept it.
GIFs: tumblr, giphy
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Published on Sep 22, 2015