There’s this phenomenon everyone keeps talking about which you just don’t seem to get – clubbing! You allegedly have to dress up, leave the comforts of your own home and go stand in a very crowded space with a lot of sweaty people. Not only that, you have to pay a LOT of money to do this.
If you, girl, are one of those people who just doesn’t GET the concept, we are SO with you! *High fiving like a boss*
1. So you want me to clean up on a Saturday night so I can go get other people’s sweat all over me?
Umm, no thanks!
2. My friends want a night out where we can dance!
Girl, let’s face it, we’ll get more dancing done if we join a random baraat on the road!
3. People seem to have a whole separate wardrobe for “clubbing clothes”.
Or as we’d like to describe them: teeny-tiny clothes with lots of holes! #Gareebi
4. They say it’s totally safe and there are bouncers to protect you!
But then why do they look like the ones you need to be protected from?
5. They say it’s a great way to meet guys!
Clubbing - for all the drunk, sleazy, sweaty men in the world. Gross!!
6. Let’s talk about the alcohol prices for a minute...
Unless Vijay Mallya is personally coming to pour me that drink, I’m not paying that much!
7. Did you say a great new DJ was playing?
I’d buy your point, except for the fact that there’s every chance I won’t be able to hear a single thing at that club!
8. My friends love to unwind by going to the latest new club in town.
I’m sorry if my idea of unwinding does not involve getting stepped on all night! Kthanxbye.
9. Dear couples on the dance floor: you call it grinding, I call it dry humping!
Tres classy, BTW!
10. If you need to talk, smoke, breathe, see – you basically need to step outside the club.
Please remind me why we paid so much money to get in?
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