Think about a baby’s life - you get up, eat, sleep, do your, ahem, business - and then loll about all day while people coochie-coo about how absolutely adorable you are!
Sounds pretty sweet, right? If you think about it, it’s also like most of our lives…on a Sunday! But there are some things that these terrific toddlers have the luxury of doing on a daily basis that we think should actually be allowed for adults too!
1. Throw a tantrum when you don’t get what you want
Imagine just stomping your feet on the ground until you get that raise. Now that’s a job well done, madam - a job well done, indeed!
2. Burst into tears whenever you feel like it
Especially in the office at 2 p.m. when that hanger
(hunger plus anger, man) just gets too damn real.
3. Play on the swings for hours at the local park - while someone else pushes you, of course!
And don’t even get me started on those slides and roundabouts. I want to say wheeeee too, damnit.
4. Love, unconditionally and unsurreptitiously
This one’s a bit sappy, but wouldn’t it be lovely to go through life not being cynical and jaded and just loving wholeheartedly like you do when you’re a kid?
5. Fall asleep when you like, where you like
A kid falls asleep on your lap at a party, and it’s the cutest thing ever. You do it, and everyone’s all like “Who let Sakshi have too much wine again?” Jeez.
6. Turn anything into a fort!
Under the table - fort. Bunch of cushions on the floor- fort. Sofa - fort surrounded by molten lava on the floor, must-not-fall-off!
7. For that matter, I would like to spend my days playing hide-and-seek again
Now the only thing I seem to be hiding from is deadlines and the only thing I am seeking is money!
8. Wear cute clothes like dungarees and onesies
And not have to be considered a hipster
for doing so!
9. Demand candy floss and balloons wherever you go
I happen to still enjoy the taste of that pink sugary goodness, and balloons are shiny - I like shiny things too. That being said, if anyone who knows me is reading this - diamonds will do just fine as a substitute!
10. Take life one free meal at a time
Babies don’t pay bills or plan vacations - they just come along and get to have fun!
11. Plonk down in someone’s godi when you’re done walking for the day!
Especially now that we wear heels. I mean, come on - who thought of the order of life here?
12. Get people to buy you stuff
Day in, day out. I might be a grownup, but that doesn’t mean I am good at managing money and I may have spent it all on ice cream already - so, can you buy me some makeup?!
13. Make all the problems in the world disappear with the appearance of your favourite cuddly toy.
It’d be nice if your teddy really did have superpowers, after all.
14. Have an imaginary friend
Joey totally had this one down. Imaginary Friend: Maurice. Occupation: Space Cowboy!
15. Question absolutely everything and everyone
Why are you ignoring me? What did you do last night? Who are you with? When am I going to be queen of the world? ... And the like!
16. Have a bouncy castle at your birthday party
Now, this point’s a serious one, people. I want a bloody bouncy castle, candy floss machine, a clown and presents - LOTS of presents - at my next birthday. I will be turning 25, thank you!
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