Getting back in the dating game at the end of a relationship can be a pretty daunting task. After all, not only are you trying to figure out a future relationship but also battling the negatives of the one just past. But that’s no reason to feel like you can’t do it!
You CAN. All you need is a little determination, and a few rules to keep reminding yourself of. You know what they say, right? The best way to deal with falling off a horse is getting right back into the saddle. It’s the same thing with relationships too. No matter how jaded you feel, there is light at the end of the tunnel - and here’s how you get there!
1. Do go out and meet new people
And no, we don’t just mean prospective partners. Make new friends, try and do something untested. Fill up those hours you would have otherwise spent with your now-ex-partner with fresh experiences.
2. Do not wallow
Moping over what’s done is a crime you commit against yourself. Sure, you are bound to go through phases of upset and unhappiness, but snap out of it as soon and as frequently as you can. The world is there, waiting for you to explore it.
3. Do hang out with your single friends
Hanging out with just other couples is bound to make you feel a little bad about yourself, no matter how much you love them.
4. Do not stalk your ex on social media
(Or in real life, of course!) Yes, we get that you just want to know what’s up with him, how he’s doing - he was a big part of your life, so this is natural. But it is not necessary. Thinking about him, following his status updates obsessively - these are NOT things that are going to help you gain closure.
5. Do try out a dating app
It’s a gentle, non-threatening way of getting back into the “romance” game. It may be too early to think about a serious relationship, of course, but there is no harm in checking out what - and who - is out there
. Look at profiles, talk to the guys, check out things that potential “partners” are interested in. It will also help you clarify your thoughts about what you want out of your next relationship - no matter how far away in the future it is.
6. Do not binge-watch rom-coms
No, it’s never THAT easy in real life! You must connect with what gives you pleasure, of course, but don’t fall into the trap of living in a built-in-your-head, completely romanticized fantasy of love - which, alas, the majority of movies tend to be.
7. Do take time to introspect
Not just about what you want out of a relationship but also your life in the longer term. Do your relationship goals match with your life goals? Figure that out, else you risk heading into another relationship that makes you less-than-happy about life in general.
8. Do not fall for a guy just because he reminds you of your ex!
Girl, it didn’t work out for a reason. Accept it, explore new territories. And new kinds of people.
9. Do pamper yourself
We recommend a shopping spree to celebrate your new-found single status! As an added bonus, you’ll have new clothes to flaunt at your next night out. ;-)
10. Do not hook up with your ex
Shut. That. Door. FIRMLY.
11. Do find a fun mixer to go to
Again, check out your options
. And if you meet someone you really like, what’s the harm in flirting a little? After all, practice makes perfect!
12. Do not give up hope
It’ll work out when it works out. Love isn’t easy always, but it is pretty beautiful. Stick around. Who knows what might happen?
Images: Tumblr, Shutterstock
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