31 Things Only Indians Say - Guilty as Charged!

As Indians, we’re all guilty of using some of these popular phrases at some point or the other, and they can really make other people go WTHeyy?! These Indianisms define us. Sure, most are incorrect when you think of “pure” English and sound absolutely hilarious, but who cares? At least they reflect our unique flavour! Here are our top picks of things only Indians say. Enjoy! :-)

1. Would you like a cold drink?

Not a soda, not an aerated drink. We drink only “cold” drinks.

2. I am going out of station.

We don’t like to travel. We like going out of station.

3. What is your good name?

Shubh naam, anyone?

4. Side, please.

You mean: ‘Excuse me!’?

5. Will you do fraandship with me? Plz...

NO!

6. Can we prepone the meeting?

This one we love - makes total sense (and should officially be added to the Oxford English Dictionary) :-)

7. Entry from back.

Er, no. We’re not talking about R-rated stuff. It’s usually shop signage that proudly declares this.

9. I proposed to her.

Contrary to popular belief, proposed should only only be used in reference to marriage - and not when you’re asking someone out.

10. I have to tell you a non-veg joke!!!

Go ahead, tell us a dirty joke!

11. I got my chums.

She means she got her period.

12. You cheater cock!

This one is left over from our schooldays.

13. I’m maanglik / We couldn’t get married because our kundlis didn’t match.

The babas decided our fate here.

14. Your hairs are so long!

We like plurality in our locks, yes.

15. I passed out from college 4 years ago.

Cool, that makes you a degree-d drunk!

16. I will revert back soon.

The “back” is redundant, but we like to emphasize it anyway. And “revert” sounds so much more sombre and official than plain old “reply”, doesn’t it?

17. This is more better.

More emphasizing.

18. Enthu cutlet.

This one we love. Totally sums up our feelings about over-enthusiastic people. But why cutlet?!

19. God promise. Mummy promise.

All of us are SO guilty of this. *Childhood nostalgia*

20. Have you reduced?

Meaning: Have you lost weight?

21. When will you give us good news?

Translation: Are you pregnant yet?

22. Shut the fan/light.

You mean switch off, right?

23. This is nice, no?

Because if you say “no”, the other person’s gotta say “yes”, no?

24. Are you enjoying?

Enjoying what, we ask?

25. It’s raining outside.

Because, you know, in many countries it rains indoors.

26. I’m like that only! I’m here only.

’Cos “only” can be added to everything!

27. Let’s do some timepass.

Or some TP.

28. What’s the programme/scene?

We don’t like asking about plans. We need a full programme.

29. Nice goggles/glares, yaar.

Sunglasses, people, it’s sunglasses.

30. Cousin sister, cousin brother.

As opposed to our “real” sisters and “real” brothers. (Which is also a very Indian thing to say!)

31. He is my rakhi brother.

You don’t say? :P   MUST-READ: 21 Funny Things Indian Moms Do That Make Us Go Both Uff! AND Aww! MUST-READ: 18 Pickup Lines That NEVER Work in India