You know how a lot of men seem really confused about whether a woman has actually agreed to have sex with them or not (before they go ahead and “do it with her”, even if she thinks she’s said no) – well, blogger Rockstar Dinosaur Pirate Princess has come up with an analogy that can actually clear it all up. And this is particularly appropriate for us Indians. Given that everyone in India drinks tea. Or is at least familiar enough with it to get what we’re talking about.
So this is how RDPP breaks it down about the appropriateness of serving someone chai. A.k.a., Having Sex With You (HSWY).
1. When do they actually want chai (HSWY)?
‘You say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they go “omg fuck yes, I would fucking LOVE a cup of tea! Thank you!*” then you know they want a cup of tea.’ Source.
2. What do you do if they seem undecided about chai (HSWY)? Is it okay to attempt some chance pe dance?
‘If you say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they…say, “I’m not really sure…” then you can make them a cup of tea or not, but be aware that they might not drink it, and if they don’t drink it then – this is the important bit – don’t make them drink it. You can’t blame them for you going to the effort of making the tea on the off-chance they wanted it; you just have to deal with them not drinking it.’ Source.
3. How do you know that they actively do not want chai (HSWY)?
‘If they say “No thank you” then don’t make them tea. At all. Don’t make them tea, don’t make them drink tea, don’t get annoyed at them for not wanting tea. They just don’t want tea, ok?’ Source.
4. What do you do when they change their mind about the chai (HSWY)?
‘They might say “Yes please, that’s kind of you” and then when the tea arrives they actually don’t want the tea at all. Sure, that’s kind of annoying as you’ve gone to the effort of making the tea, but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea. They did want tea, now they don’t. Sometimes people change their mind… And it’s ok for people to change their mind…’ Source.
5. When can you be sure that they definitely don’t want chai (HSWY), even if they haven’t explicitly said so?
‘If they are unconscious, don’t make them tea. Unconscious people don’t want tea and can’t answer the question “do you want tea” because they are unconscious… Ok, maybe they were conscious when you asked them if they wanted tea, and they said yes, but in the time it took you to boil that kettle, brew the tea and add the milk they are now unconscious. You should just put the tea down, make sure the unconscious person is safe, and – this is the important bit – don’t make them drink the tea.’ Source.
6. When should you STOP feeding them chai (HSWY)?
‘If someone said yes to tea, started drinking it, and then passed out before they’d finished it, don’t keep on pouring it down their throat. Take the tea away and make sure they are safe. Because unconscious people don’t want tea.’ Source.
7. When should you stop pestering them about chai (HSWY) altogether?
‘If someone said “yes” to tea…last saturday, that doesn’t mean that they want you to make them tea all the time. They don’t want you to come around unexpectedly to their place and make them tea and force them to drink it going “BUT YOU WANTED TEA LAST WEEK”, or to wake up to find you pouring tea down their throat going “BUT YOU WANTED TEA LAST NIGHT”.’ Source.
So, now that we’ve got all of that cleared up, let’s hope people have less moronic opinions to offer about what they think about women who are forced to drink chai (HSWY) without actually wanting to.
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